Seven Months of Eden

Author: by Rysler

Date: June 4, 2007

* * *

August, 2004


"Whoever arranges concerts in Bryant Park in August hates the theater," Julia said. She was sweating through her tee shirt, and she had an hour before she had to go on. She should go sit in Starbucks, but that felt diva-ish. And besides, it was crowded with everyone else. So there'd be heat and body odor. She was better off. Especially standing next to Eden.


Eden, in BKLYN gear and a hair style Julia would have prevented had she been consulted, tilted her face toward the sun.


Julia cleared her throat.


Eden, without opening her eyes, said, "Broadway in Bryant Park is for the tourists. They come to New York in the summer to escape the hellhole they're coming from."


"I'll feel better," Julia said, "When I hear you sing."


Eden said, "I should sing Ice, Ice, Baby then."


"If you do that, I will strip when it's my turn."


Eden opened her eyes and stared at Julia.


Julia flapped her tee shirt.


Eden shrugged, and said, "You'd strip for a popsicle."


"Probably," Julia said. She frowned an said, "Do you have one?"


"In my freezer," Eden said.


"Really?"


"I love popsicles."


"I didn't know that about you," Julia said.


"Eden! Five minutes!" The director called.


"Five minutes," Julia said.


Eden nodded. She gave a little shrug and turned to go.


Julia smiled, and said, "See you in five minutes."


Eden climbed the steps, and marveled at how Eden had made her feel better with the most inane conversation ever. Eden had a gift. Or, was a gift. Julia tried to accept being happy that her palms were sweating, instead of the rest of her, as Eden began to sing.


* * *


September, 2004


"Ladies," Seth said, draping his arms around Raul's and Julia's necks. He crammed himself between them. The lobby of the recording studio was small and filled with people. Seth had put on a big show, and the CD was going to be just as big. Unless the air conditioning in the building went and they started a riot.


Julia squirmed distractedly, keeping her attention on Eden across the room. Who was laughing at them. Julia stuck out her tongue.


Eden fell off the desk.


Seth said, "I'm so glad we get to do this."


"Me, too," Julia said. "I'm going to go talk to Eden." She scooted away from Seth and went toward the bench.


"She's going to go talk to Eden," Seth said.


"She's going to go talk to Eden," Raul agreed.


"Hi," Julia said, settling onto the bench.


"Hi. I'm honored you left a man sandwich to come talk to me," Eden said.


"It's not as much fun as you'd think when they'd rather flirt with each other."


Eden nodded. She slouched against Julia and picked up her notes.


Julia looked over her shoulder. "Dirty hippie," she said. Eden nudged her. Julia said, "How's the next big Broadway star?"


Eden blushed.


"According to a news report, I was simply 'Upcoming Hair star.' After the CD, what will I be? Has-been Hair star?"


Eden flipped over her paper, and said, "You will always be immortal as long as I can hear your sweet voice on the Tampax commercials."


Julia stiffened.


Eden looked over. "What?"


"You pay attention to my commercials?"


"Of course. When they're on during Golden Girls. Doesn't everyone?"


"Only everyone weird."


"Oh, look, there's Gavin." Eden waved at him, wiggling her fingers.


He waved back.


"You are not going to go talk to him, are you?" Julia asked.


"You know I only talk to you at these events," Eden said.


Julia stuck out her pinkie. Eden shook it.


Eden asked, "Do you have this album?"


"My parents did. I listened to it occasionally. They went to see the show. But I wasn't allowed to go with them."


Eden nodded.


"You?"


"No. My parents never mentioned it. I guess it's cool, growing up in New York."


"Oh, yeah. Waiting around for the revolution was great fun for my parents, while they dodged the draft and tried to graduate from college. I was named after a Beatles song, you know," Julia said.


"Really?"


"Yes. 'Julia.' White Album. The whole enchilada," Julia asked.


"I've never heard it," Eden said. She lifted a hand and said, "Though I have heard of the White Album."


"Well, I've never heard it outside my father's old records, so I don't blame you," Julia said.


"What's a record?"


Julia jabbed Eden's shoulder.


"Your parents liked the Beatles?" Eden said.


"They were young and foolish hippies, I think," Julia said. She sighed. "Technically, I was a flower child."


"I've always thought so," Eden said.


Julia raised an eyebrow.


"I mean, in a good way."


"Now I am Julia Murney, voice of the products you don't need, but should buy." Julia said. She brought her knees up to her chin and hugged them, saying, "Apparently my generation was supposed to change the world. And here I am, doing Hair. Cruelly ironic. All that never came true. It--" Julia stopped.


"Sucks," Eden said.


"The baby boomers had full frontal, cussing, desecrating the flag. Progressive. Dangerous. Now we're just--imitating it."


"Hey, I'm doing Brooklyn," Eden said.


Julia put her cheek on her knees and gazed at Eden, who smiled brightly, and reached out to brush hair away from Julia's face. Julia wrinkled her nose.


"What do you want?" Eden asked.


A whole world of answers flooded Julia's mind. She wanted to be her parents. She wanted peace in her lifetime. She wanted to not have to take off her clothes on stage. She went with, "Changing the world would be enough." She hesitated, and then amended, "For good, of course."


"I think you are," Eden said.


Julia squinted.


"The world is a better place with you in it," Eden said, and then looked down at her hands.


"Oh, geez, Eden."


"I'm not kidding."


"You're wrong," Julia said.


Eden opened her mouth to protest, and Julia pressed her hand to it. She said, "It takes two." Eden smiled against her palm.


"Eden," Seth called, waving at her.


"Have to go," Eden said. "How I love my hippie life."


Julia looked at her own lyrics sheet. Raul sat down next to her and flashed a bashful smile. "Why do I live?" she asked him.


"If I was invisible, I could do anything," he responded.


"Were your parents flower children?" She asked.


Raul rubbed the back of his head and frowned. Julia took his jaw in her hand, tilted his head back and forth. He gave a little shrug. She said, "Sorry."


He leaned forward and kissed her cheek, and said, "Go watch Eden sing."


"I will." She stood. "Why am I doing this?"


"She has a great body," Raul said.


"Not everyone is gay, Raul," she said.


"Not everyone," he said.


She went into the observation room and stood behind the sound mixer. Eden's eyes were closed. She held her earphones and threw her head back, singing.


The director tapped the mic and said, "Sexier, Eden."


Eden opened her eyes. She saw Julia beyond the glass and smiled. Julia waved. Eden leaned closer to the microphone and sang, "What a far out trip." She kept her gaze locked to Julia's.


Julia saw Eden at nearly every benefit concert she went to, and half the parties in New York. They'd become party buddies, talking on couches or during rehearsal breaks. She'd hardly thought of Eden outside of those events, but her stomach fluttered whenever she saw her.  They'd only hugged, once. Julia remembered the embarrassment of how her body reacted when Eden touched her. She only waved after that. And Eden had kissed her cheek, once, when she'd come off-stage after singing in the park in the rain. She'd been exhilarated and soggy.


Now she would be thinking about Eden all night, and wondering what it meant that she was half-afraid to touch her.


* * *


October, 2004


"Eden?"


Eden turned around. She'd been halfway down 45th street when Julia called her name. She stopped, glancing at the Plymouth marquee before focusing her attention on Julia. "What are you doing here?" She asked.


Julia walked swiftly to catch up to her, and was out of breath when she got to Eden's side. Eden took her arm, slightly concerned Julia was going to fall over. Julia said, "I'm having lunch at the Algonquin."


"Wow," Eden said.


Julia nodded.


Eden tilted her head.


Julia said, "It's weird. I don't think I've ever seen you on the street before."


"My usual corner's at 86th," Eden said. She grinned and offered her elbow. Julia took it, and they meandered toward the Plymouth stage door.


"How's rehearsals?" Julia asked. She cursed herself for the obvious question, wondering how she could spend hours talking to Eden at any party, but her mouth went dry if they were alone together.


"We're in previews, actually," Eden said.


"I knew that. Really. I did. I didn't--"


Eden squeezed her arm. She said, "I'm sure things have been busy for you, too."


"Yeah, I--No. Not really." Julia sighed, and resolved never to walk down 46th street again if she was going to make an ass of herself and make Eden feel bad. They reached the stage door, and Eden said, "Here's my stop."


"Yeah. Break a leg, Eden."


Eden already had her arm, and turned into Julia. She hesitated, but Julia, mainly through the turning momentum, hugged her. Eden's face pressed against her hair. Julia realized after a moment that Eden wasn't going to let go, so she squeezed Eden harder and then pulled back. "See you later," Eden said.


Julia nodded. She lifted her hand in a wave as Eden went through the door. Then she turned to walk down to the hotel. She wished she asked Eden for her number.  Maybe at the next party.


* * *


November, 2004


"Julia, stop lurking," Idina said, walking past Julia and into her dressing room.


"Sorry. How's Kristin?"


"Jen's my Glinda now. Don't you follow anything in theater?"


"Apparently not."


Idina scowled, and sat down at the makeup table. She opened her lipstick, and asked, "What have you been doing?"


"Doritos commercials."


"Oh, Julia."


"Hey, I have to buy Christmas gifts."


"Speaking of. Taye and I are having a Monday night Christmas party. You should come."


"I work on Mondays," Julia said.


"You clearly know nothing about theater."


"I think Jennifer glared at me in the hallway."


"Don't take it personally."


"Why, is that her usual expression?"


Idina applied lipstick.


"Idina?"


"Just don't take it personally," Idina said. "I like her."


Julia was suddenly afraid to leave the dressing room. She said, "Which Monday?"


"First in December."


"I'll bring wine."


Idina saluted with her lipstick. The five minute call went out.


Julia went to the doorway, and paused, and said, "Will Jennifer be at this party?"


"Oh, don't be a pussy," Idina said.


* * *


December, 2004


Jennifer was not at the party, but Eden was. Julia set the wine down on Idina's kitchen counter and made her way through the morass of people toward Eden. Eden smiled awkwardly at her, and it occured to Julia she might have interrupted whatever Eden was doing. "Busy?" She asked.


Eden leaned toward her and whispered, "Bored out of my mind. Glad to see you."


"Glad to see you, too," Julia said. They smiled at each other. Julia was completely unsure of what to say. Someone jostled her, and she stumbled, and Eden caught her arm.


Brian glanced over his shoulder and said, "Sorry, Jules."


Julia punched him in the back.


He winced. "Can I get you two a drink?"


"Two drinks," Julia said.


"One," Eden said. She lifted her wine glass.


"Oh." Julia waved Brian off. He pushed between Taye and Jesse and disappeared. "We'll never see him again," Julia said.


"Want a sip of my wine?" Eden asked.


"Maybe later."


Eden still held her elbow, and Julia freed herself, and then looped her arm through Eden's. She said, "I'm sorry about Brooklyn."


"It's the business," Eden said, looking away from Julia.


"You're lasting longer than The Wild Party. Maybe the Tonys will help." Julia said. Eden began dragging her toward the end of a couch that had just opened up.


"We have another six months. And I'm on Broadway," Eden said. She smiled at Julia so benevolently that Julia was almost sure Eden wasn't being a jerk.


"You know how to count your blessings," Julia said.


Eden settled into the wedge of free couch, between the armrest and Shoshana. Shoshana grunted, without looking at Eden, and wriggled to the side to give her more space. Julia settled on the armrest. Eden's shoulder pressed against Julia's thigh. She restrained herself from putting her hand in Eden's hair. Eden took a gulp of her wine.


"I almost didn't come," Julia said. "It's damn cold."


"In December?" Eden asked.


"But it's colder than January. That's completely unfair. But I'm glad I came." She smiled at Eden. Then she looked over Eden's head, and said, "I do not recognize the blonde with Stephanie."


Eden looked behind her, winced at the contortion, and then settled back against Julia. "She's playing Glinda in the tour."


"Really?"


"It's all unofficial."


Julia drew her fingers across her lips.


Eden took another gulp of her wine, finishing it, and said, "She's doing it with Stephanie."


"Stephanie told me she was going on tour," Julia said. Then she frowned, and finished the thought, and said it out loud. "Instead of you."


"Yeah."


"Eden, I'm sorry." Julia touched Eden's cheek, just as a sympathetic gesture, but her fingers lingered. Eden didn't seem to mind. She smiled at Julia and shrugged. Julia's fingers traced Eden's jaw.


Eden said, "I've got a contract. And I'd rather stay in New York, anyway."


"Who wouldn't?"


"I'm too used to seeing you on the street," Eden said, leaning into Julia's touch.


"You mean that time I called you a hooker?" Julia's lips were dry. She wet them, and cleared her throat. She wasn't sure where this was going. She couldn't think of a graceful way to stop stroking Eden's cheek, and Eden was studying her intently, and avoiding all of her clumsy attempts at levity.


"It was memorable," Eden said.


Julia glanced at Stephanie, deep in conversation with the blonde, Brett hovering near both of them with a beer bottle in his hand. She looked back at Eden. She said, "I'd really hate it if you left."


Eden lifted her shoulders, and moved closer to Julia.


The lights went out. Julia blinked, and as her eyes adjusted, could only make out the bluish light coming from the lone window at the end of the living room. A dark figure moved in front of it. Eden grabbed her thigh. Julia moved her hand from Eden's cheek to her shoulder.


Idina yelled, "Don't worry! We'll get some candles set up, and we'll keep drinking."


Julia couldn't see anything in the dark. She felt Eden shifting against her, and moved to meet her. Eden's mouth was right where she predicted, and she kissed it. Eden sighed against her lips. Julia kissed her again, more softly, and reached up to tangle her fingers in Eden's hair. Eden's lips parted. Julia felt her lower lip sucked. She breathed against Eden's mouth. Eden twisted on the couch, crouching, and kissed Julia firmly. Julia held onto Eden's shoulders and let Eden kiss her with surprising depth and technique. She opened herself willingly to Eden's tongue, and kept her eyes closed, until Eden abruptly pulled away.


Julia opened her eyes to dozens of tiny yellow pinpricks of candlelight. She could hear Eden's breathing, and make out Eden's face in the light. Eden's dark eyes shone. Julia groped for her hand. Eden squeezed it, and didn't let go.


Brian appeared in front of them, and put a glass on the table with a flourish. "Your drink, madam."


Despite Idina's encouragement, and her promise that Julia would sing a few bars of "Raise the Roof," revellers began to leave for parties with more electricity. Someone called Eden's name and Eden let go of Julia's hand to join them. Julia realized it was the blonde she'd seen earlier who wrapped her arm around Eden's waist and led her out of the apartment.


Julia picked up the wine glass. She watched the rest of the crowd leave, in ones and twos and threes, and Taye and Idina began to pick up glasses from the surfaces of their home. She realized that she still didn't have Eden's number.


* * *


"Are you going to Seth Rudetsky's New Years Eve party?" Eden asked through the phone, after she'd confessed she'd gotten Julia's number from Idina.


"What, and miss Times Square?" Julia asked.


"Really?"


"One million people can't be wrong," Julia said. There was silence on the other end of the line. Julia said, "Okay, really, I was talking about the view from my television. I was thinking of having a bottle of wine and painting my nails."


"But the kiss," Eden said.


"Last year I kissed Jim Caruso. I swore, never again."


"And he'll be at the party," Eden said.


"I know."

Julia looked at her fingernails. They really did need filing. She supposed she could do that earlier than midnight. She looked on the side table for a file. Then she realized Eden was breathing softly into the phone, not speaking. "Oh," Julia said. "Why don't you come here for New Year's?"


"And see you outside of a social event?"


"I'm not a vampire or anything."


"How do you know I don't turn back into a pumpkin at midnight?" Eden asked, with such a sweet, shy voice that Julia guessed she'd been trained very well at Disneyland.


"It's the carriage that turns into a pumpkin. You'll just turn into an ordinary girl."


"I can't," Eden said.


"Be ordinary?" Julia rubbed her forehead and frowned at the phone.


"Skip the party. A producer will be there. I have to--to work."


"Oh," Julia said. Her breath caught as she tried to say something else. She wanted to tell Eden there was no shame, obviously, in wooing who needed to be wooed when it came to the stage. That was acting. But to say it would be patronizing, and it would make Eden feel worse. She was learning not to do that.


Eden said, "But I was planning on kissing you at midnight. I was hoping for both."


"So you want to be a mover and a shaker?"


"I want--something." Eden said with dramatic flair.


"Is that Sondheim?"


Eden's laugh tinkled across the line. She said, "That's Kendra's fault. She actually cares about theater for its own sake. Comes from being college-educated. Or going to private school, or whatever."


"Who is Kendra?"


"You met her at Idina's party," Eden said.


"I did not."


"Yes you did."


"I did not," Julia said.


"Well, she was there."


"And she's coming to Seth's?"


"No."

Julia threw up her hands. The phone waved through the air. She pulled it back to her face and sighed.


"What does Kendra have to do with this, anyway?" Eden asked.


"You brought her up."


"You brought up Sondheim," Eden said.


"Oh. Well, I will arrive at the party no later than 11 o'clock. But for now I have to go, and pick out lipgloss."


"Strawberry," Eden said.


"Really?"


"Yes."


"I have to go to the drugstore. I'll see you later."


She hung up on Eden's laughter, and then held the phone in the palm of her hand as silence descended.


* * *


Seth's party was just the same as the last one, and the one before that. She knew nearly everyone there. The scene had become incestuous. Every brought guest, every new face, was seized upon for inspiration and stimulation. She never understood Mr. Black more than when she was standing with the gay intelligencia of New York, sipping mimosas and praying that no one would discuss politics, sex, or moisturizer.


Mr. Black himself was there, talking to Jai, and Julia had found Eden, who'd smiled at her, but Eden was talking to Scott. Julia thought about asking Taye to dance, but she'd danced with Taye before. That was the whole problem.


"Julia!" Andrew came up to kiss her, and Julia kissed him back, letting herself settle into his arms. He provided some protection from the crowded, tiny room, even as he sniffed the air too close to her lips. "Strawberries? You?"


"It was by request," Julia said.


He surveyed the crowd and said, "Now I know why people go to Hollywood."


"And why they come back."


"Different poison, same effect," Andrew said.


Julia put her head on his shoulder and said, "Do you ever think about going to a small villa on the coast and writing music?"


"The coast of what, my darling?"


"I don't know. Like, the coast of Europe."


"I do. Every day I do. And Brad Pitt will join me, and Madonna, of course, will sing for me, only she'll sound like Bernadette Peters and Madonna at the same time, and we'll eat fruit and little orphans will run at our heels and I'll drive into Paris every weekend and conduct the operas."


"So why are you at this lame party?"


"Because in New York there are a thousand Bernadette Peters, a hundred auditoriums, and I have to work. I have to work here."


Julia sighed.


"And you are here to sing for me," Andrew said. "But Eden is done talking to Scott, so you can stop pretending to enjoy my company."


"God. Does everyone know?"


"We have to get our entertainment somehow."


"Do you know Kendra?"


"Sure. She's a friend of Joe's."


Julia frowned.


"Assassins?" Andrew offered.


"I really have no idea," Julia said. "If she was in The Wild Party, who would she be?"


"You," Andrew said.


"That's not funny."


"Of course it's not funny. Go talk to Eden," Andrew said. He took his cranberry and vodka cocktail and went to talk to Don.


Julia pushed her way through the crowd, but Eden wasn't standing where she was before. Julia turned around, searching the room, feeling too short. She asked herself why Sutton hadn't come to be useful. A hand touched her waist. She turned, and it was Eden, smiling at her. Julia reached down and took her hand, and squeezed.


Eden reached her free arm up to Julia's shoulder, prudently latching onto her as the crowd shifted around them. Amy tried to duck between them, on her way to the bar, but Julia moved closer to Eden, removing the space between them. Eden kissed her. "Strawberry," she said.


Julia's lips tingled pleasantly. She cleared her throat, and said, "I thought we weren't going to kiss until midnight?"


"What gave you that idea?" Eden asked. Her fingers played with Julia's ear.


"Too much television, I guess."


Julia kissed Eden. She pressed her lips to Eden's, closed her eyes, and after a moment mumbled, "You're not wearing lip gloss."


"Lipstick," Eden said.


Julia drew back to study Eden's face. She was heavily made up. Her eyes were lined in black, and her lipstick was bright red, Julia guessed, though it looked brown in the dim apartment. There was red glitter on her cheek. Julia smudged it with her thumb. Eden looked ten years older than she had under the sun in Bryant Park. "You're no ordinary girl," she said, and Eden turned her head to kiss Julia's fingers.


Eden said, "It's almost midnight. We can still make it to Times Square before I change back."


Julia turned toward the door. Seth blocked it. He lifted a wine glass and tapped it with a fork. The room quieted. The din of murmuring and shuffling pounded in Julia's ears. Seth was looking straight at her. That couldn't be good.


"It is now 11:50. As we have all heard, there's a new jukebox musical on the horizon."


Julia groaned.


Eden, standing slightly behind her in the pinch of the crowd, slid her arm around Julia's waist. Julia covered her hand.


"Ladies and gentlemen, to celebrate the future success of our friends, I give you Mr. Taye Diggs, singing Mr. John Lennon."


"Hey," Eden said against her ear. "Did you notice Idina isn't at this party?"


"She's only got about ten performances left. Including one tonight."


"Ah."


Taye flashed Julia his brightest smile, and began to sing.


"Is he singing--?" Julia asked.


"Yes," Eden said.


"Oh, God."


"This is so inappropriate. And he's kind of sexy."


"Yes."


Taye sang, "If she won't be a slave, we say that she don't love us..."


Eden was swaying, moving Julia's body with hers. Julia turned away from Taye, into Eden's arms, and looped her arms over Eden's shoulders.


"Do you know this song?" Eden asked.


"We tell her home is the only place she should be," Julia sang, softly, to Taye's tenor.


The chorus came, and Seth yelled, "Everyone, now!"


The whole room sang, with Andrew on the piano, except for Julia and Eden. They kissed in the midst of the crowd. "We make her paint her face and dance," Eden whispered, and captured Julia's mouth again.


The clock counted down to midnight.


* * *


January, 2005


Julia dreamt of Cincinnati, which looked oddly like the surface of the moon. She'd never been to Cincinnati. She'd never been to the moon, either. Her father was there, which reminded her of that movie Contact. Had Jodie Foster ever been on stage? Or, to Cincinnati? There was a loud buzzing. A rocket ship landing in Cincinnati, maybe. Julia looked around for it. The buzzing seemed just by her ear, and always out of reach. She turned, and turned.


Her eyes opened.


The cellphone blared by her ear. She groped for it, and said, "Hello?"


"Were you asleep?"


"Who is this?" Julia asked, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling, trying to remember why she had a mental image of Jodie Foster. Had she been having a dirty dream?


"It's Eden. Julia, you need to come to the hospital."


Julia sat up. "Which hospital? Are you okay?"


"I'm fine. It's Idina."


Julia got out of bed, and looked down at herself. Sweats. That would do. She looked for shoes. "Is Idina okay?" She asked.


"Something crunched."


Julia dropped the phone. She knelt on the floor to pick it up, and saw slippers under the bed. She put the phone to her ear, but didn't speak. If she spoke, she'd throw up.


"I don't think it's anything--fatal."


Julia swallowed. The lump in her throat went down, and then slowly rose back up. She asked, "Career-ending?"


"I don't know." Eden told her the name of the hospital, and then asked, "Really. Did I wake you up?"


"Yes. It's the middle of a Saturday afternoon," Julia said. She put on her slippers.


She heard talking on the other side of the phone, indistinct, from multiple voices, and then Eden saying, "Maybe you shouldn't come. It's crowded."


"Eden."


"I have--I have a show in a few hours."


"I'll come and walk you back to the theater, then."


Eden sniffled.


Julia pulled the phone away from her ear and frowned. "Aw, gee, Eden."


"I heard that," Eden said.


Julia put the phone to her ear and said, "I'll be right there."


"Okay," Eden said.


Julia hung up, marveling at the words that had been on the tip of her tongue. She swallowed them. The phone rang. She opened it.


Shoshana said, "I am sitting here in my dressing room, crying, and really, the green is getting everywhere, and I thought to myself, who to call? Julia fucking Murney."


"Hi," Julia said.


"Since you haven't asked me why I'm calling, I assume you know." Shoshana's voice sounded choked with tears, but steady, with a watery, heaving depth.


"Eden called me. I'm on my way to the hospital. What happened?"


"Oh. Well, Dee was melting, right?"


"Okay." Julia grabbed her wallet and her keys and put them in her sweat pants pocket. She opened the door and braced herself for the world.


"She fell through the trap door."


"What?"


"Seriously. She made this horrible noise. Like, she was already making all those melting screeches, but this one was way worse. Jennifer went to pick up the hat, and looked in the hole, and then she screamed, and then they brought the curtain down behind her."


"Ouch," Julia said.


"Dee seemed okay when they put her on the ambulance. Kind of annoyed."


Julia put on her sunglasses and then walked onto the sidewalk. She realized she needed to call a cab. "Sho, I need to call a cab."


"You're not in Midtown?"


"No, I'm at home."


"In the middle of the day?"


Julia sighed and squeezed the phone harder. She said, "I was asleep."


"Jesus, Julia."


"I work a normal job," Julia said.


The phone was silent, and Julia pressed it harder against her ear. She heard an intake of breath and then a sob breaking over the line. "Shoshana, don't do that," she said.


"I have to go on tonight," Shoshana said. "I had to go on today. Can you believe it? They announce and they bring the curtain up, and it's me that climbs out of the trap door. Joey was shaking. I held him and he was shaking."


"I'll come by," Julia said.


"Stay and sit in the house seats. Hey, Jules?" Shoshana said. "I'm Elphaba."


"I'll watch from the wings," Julia said.


Shoshana cackled through the phone.


* * *


St. Vincents was easy enough to navigate when a celebrity had fallen. She followed the crowds to where nurses circled Taye. He seemed in good enough spirits that her own heart lessened its pounding. She tried to go toward him, but was thwarted by a sea of people. He winked at her. She circumnavigated and found Eden, looking small and lost, tucked into a waiting room chair. Julia sat down next to her, and said, "Can I have that Reader's Digest?"


"Julia," Eden said. She leaned into Julia. Julia pressed her forehead against Eden's temple. Eden reached for her hand. Julia grasped her fingers.


Julia said, "No, really. I want the Reader's Digest."


Eden's shoulders shook with laughter. She picked up the magazine and smacked Julia's knee. Julia took the magazine and tossed it back onto the table. She twisted in the chair so she faced Eden's side, and asked, "Are you all right?"


Eden blinked at her, squared her shoulders, and said, "I'm fine."


"And Idina?"


"Cracked rib."


Julia winced.


Eden rubbed her forehead against Julia's. She said, "Shoshana called me when I was at the stage door. Those poor kids. I didn't sign their autographs."


"Why'd she call you?"


Eden's face fell.


"I didn't mean it like that. I meant--she didn't call me," Julia said.


"I asked if I could be the one to tell you."


Julia squeezed. She said, "That's sweet."


Eden covered her hand with her free hand and traced Julia's fingers.


"And the right thing to do," Julia said.


Eden nodded shortly. She glanced around, focusing on Taye briefly, and then looked back at Julia. "Anyway, Sho. That was standby-to-standby. She was pretty freaked out."


Julia sat back in her chair and sighed. "You guys have a secret club."


"We do." Eden paused, then said, "I'm sorry you bombed the audition."


Julia frowned.


"And then the other one."


"Eden!"


Eden gave her a wan smile. Julia stood up and tugged on her hand. She said, "Come on. This place is warping your brain." Eden stood up with her. Julia head her toward the hospital exit. Behind them, Taye wolf whistled. Julia looked over her shoulder. Taye pointed to a hallway where a door stood ajar.


Julia turned around and went toward the doorway. There were no doctors or nurses, just Idina, eyes closed, with a faint smile on her face. Julia squeezed Eden's hand tighter and said, "Dee?"


Idina opened her eyes halfway. "Julia. What are you doing here?"


"Eden called. Where is everyone?"


"Jen came after curtain call, and stayed until they took me for x-rays. My parents are on their way." Idina closed her eyes again and licked her lips. "I think I fell off the stage."


"Through the stage," Julia said, sitting on the edge of the bed. Eden stood next to her, with her hand on Julia's shoulder.


"Did you see?" Idina asked.


"I was asleep."


Idina frowned.


Julia said, "Not in the audience. I was asleep at home."


"Oh, that's right. Julia, come closer."


Julia leaned toward Idina. Idina reached up and grabbed the back of her head and yanked her down, kissing her. Julia flailed, and Eden wrapped an arm around her chest and pulled her back. Idina smiled, her eyes still closed.


"Jesus Christ. Morphine, Idina?" Julia asked.


"Percocet. Heaven."


Julia glanced at Eden, wiped her lips, and said, "We're going to leave now, and go see your decrepit shell of a show."


"Tell Sho to break a--Well. Tell her to have a good show."


Julia walked out with Eden, who waited until they were on the sidewalk and heading down the street to ask, "Does Idina kiss you often?"


"Not--often."


"Funny. She's never kissed me."


"Eden, she's in pain."


Eden squeezed Julia's arm, and leaned into her as they walked. She said, "I think this may be my best performance ever, tonight."


"Eden. Promise me you'll never do Wicked again."


Eden chuckled.


"I'm serious." Julia pulled her to a halt alongside the Plymouth, and said, "It's dangerous."


"Idina's had like, three hundred performances. I promise I'll stop at 299."


"Promise?"


Eden kissed Julia's chin and said, "Yes."


Julia tilted her head to kiss Eden, but Eden stepped back. Julia's eyes widened.


"Julia?"


"Yeah?"


"What are you wearing?"


Julia looked down at herself, and then frowned at Eden. She said, "I was asleep."


Eden sighed. She opened the stage door and went through, holding it open for Julia to follow.


"What?" Julia asked. She blinked in the dusky light of the lobby, waiting for her eyes to readjust now that sunlight had vanished.


"I'm just sad that you don't sleep in the nude."


Julia nearly tripped. Eden took her hand and led her to the back stairwell. She asked, "Want to see my dressing room?"


"Do you have a steamy frog?"


"...No."


"Do you have a vapor rana?"


"That's ranita de vapor, and no."


A stage hand blew past them in the hallway, and called out, "Eden, you've got an hour. Where were you?"


"St. Vincent's," Eden said.


"On a Saturday?"


"It's not a church, Frankie."


The stage hand rubbed his forehead, and then squinted at Julia. "Who're you?"


"I'm Julia Murney."


The stage hand shrugged and went down the stairs they had just come up.


Julia frowned.


"Oh, don't brood. You got to sleep all afternoon, while Manhattan fell apart."


"Just 42nd street," Julia said.


Eden flipped on the light, and Julia closed the door of the dressing room. The room was tiny and cramped. Eden didn't have a couch, just a wardrobe, a shower, and her makeup table.


"Your own dressing room," Julia said.


Eden smiled. She sat down in the chair. Julia walked around the edge of the room, studying the pictures on the wall. She tapped one she didn't recognize, and asked, "Your family?"


"Yes."


"Cute."


"Now that they are in California and I am here, yes."


"Have they seen you?" Julia asked, as she peeked in the shower.


"Of course. In Wicked and in Brooklyn. They felt they deserved it, after hauling ass to see my teacup impressions. Julia, what are you--"


"Strawberry Suave," Julia said.


"Yes." Eden fiddled with the lipstick on the table. Julia came behind her, and put her hands on the back of Eden's chair. They gazed at each other in the mirror. Julia slowly bent down, keeping her eyes locked to Eden's, and kissed the side of Eden's face. Eden exhaled. She closed her eyes. Julia's lips traveled across her jaw, and then down her neck. Eden arched. Julia put her hands on Eden's shoulders.


Eden reached up for Julia's hands and pulled them lower, so that Julia was hugging her in the chair. Julia kissed her ear, and then blew against it. Eden hissed. Julia pressed her open mouth against Eden. She tasted Eden's sweat. Eden's hair tickled her cheek. Since Idina's Christmas party she'd wanted to be this close to Eden every time she saw her. Her lips would hurt until she kissed Eden. Her hands would tremble.


Her hands, still trembling, moved over Eden's chest. Eden guided her, stroking her wrists and the backs of her hands. She covered Eden's breasts. Eden rolled her head back, leaning against Julia's shoulder. Julia glanced at the mirror. The eroticism of their pose made her quickly glance away. She kissed Eden's jaw, and then found her lips. Eden let out a whimper and kissed her back. Her nipples, hardening beneath her shirt, poked Julia's fingers. Julia stroked one with the tip of her finger.


A knock came at the door. "Forty-five minutes, Eden," Frankie called.


Julia wrenched her mouth away. Eden stayed in the same pose, eyes closed, mouth open, panting. She squeezed Julia's hands, and then let go. Julia straightened. "Maybe I should go," she said.


Eden nodded, still breathless, and straightened to peer at herself in the mirror. She picked up lipstick. Julia stroked the top of her head. Eden smiled and said, "I'm definitely going to be on tonight."


* * *


Julia watched from the wings. Shoshana took her bow in front of the screaming crowd, catcalling and cheering. Someone even hollered her name. Shoshana kept waving until the curtain fell down, and then she rushed over and hugged Julia's neck.


"Congratulations," Julia mumbled, as the Glinda strutted past them both, leading the ensemble off-stage.


Shoshana giggled against her neck and said, "I have to shower. Let's go see Idina, though, after."


"I'll see you outside, then."


Shoshana released her, almost sending her sprawling, and then dashed off. Julia meandered, talking to the crew she'd met before at Idina's parties. The theater had nearly cleared out by the time she rode the escalator. The booth in front sold CDs to a few stragglers. She dodged cars in the parking lot and found the stage door still lively. Eden was there, with roses.


"For me?" Julia asked, leaning in to kiss her cheek.


Eden pecked the air and said, "For Shoshana. Is she inside?"


"I suppose. I meandered."


Eden squinted at her.


Michelle waved at them from the autograph line. A redhead followed her, also signing.


"Who's that?" Julia asked.


"Jen?"


Jennifer looked up when Eden said her name, and smiled at them. "Good show?" Eden asked. Jennifer nodded, and then knelt to pose with a small boy in a pink leotard. Julia rubbed her eyes.


Shoshana burst through the stage door, waving with both hands. The screaming began anew. Julia stepped closer to Eden, and whispered, "Will they do this at Lennon?"


"Will they do this at Lennon? Chica."


Julia sighed.


When Shoshana was halfway down the barricade and Julia could hear again, Jennifer shouted, "I'm going to the hospital." Shoshana blew her a kiss. Jennifer scurried down the block.


"She's not taking her car," Julia said. "Very un-diva-like of her."


"It's three blocks. Even Kristin Chenoweth would walk."


"Yes, but she'd walk with an entourage," Julia said.


Eden giggled. She thrust her roses at Shoshana, who hugged them both at the same time.


"Are we going to see Idina?" Julia asked.


"We can't," Shoshana said. "I called her from the dressing room. No visitors at this hour."


"But Jen just went," Eden said.


"Jen's no visitor." Shoshana said, and winked. Julia rolled her eyes. Shoshana swatted her arm, and said, "I'm just saying. Girl has a pass. And since we're all flushed from the great experience called acting--except you, Julia--and traumatized as shit--let's go drinking."


Eden glanced at Julia, who smiled at her. "Let's," Eden said.


"Let's take the car," Shoshana said, and dove into the backseat of the Mercedes. Frankie held the door open. Julia wriggled in after her, and then Eden, laughing, cramming herself against Julia's back.


Julia asked, "What's it like working with Jennifer Laura?"


"Amazing." Shoshana rolled her head against the headboard and took a deep breath. "So trusting. So willing to laugh. She makes it easy. I can't imagine doing it with anyone else."


"The poor standby," Eden said.


"Oh, don't go all understudy clique on me, Eden. I love Megan, too."


Julia leaned back against Eden.


Shoshana peered at them, and said, "When's your concert?"


"Next month."


"Monday?"


"Of course."


"So there," Shoshana said. "And for now? So getting trashed."


"Where?" Julia said.


"I thought you two would want to go someplace in the East Village," Shoshana said.


Julia smacked her.


"Well?" Shoshana asked.


"All right. Yeah, we kind of do."


Shoshana steepled her fingers, and said, "I know just the place."


* * *


They stumbled out of Lit, hanging onto each other. Eden coughed from the smoke. Shoshana, slightly buzzed, said, "That place smelled like body odor."


"It's Saturday night, isn't it?" Julia said.


"So, Otto's?" Shoshana asked.


Eden's arm was around Julia's waist, and she was as close as possible as the overheated bar gave way to the sidewalk chilled by the January night. She said, "Let's go somewhere where no one will ask us about Idina."


"Starlight," Shoshana said.


"It'll be even more crowded than this place," Julia said.


"But there's disco."


"And hot chicks," Eden said.


Julia frowned.


Eden's hand on Julia's waist moved lower and smacked her ass.


"Fine. But this is the last bar," Julia said.


Shoshana shrugged.


Starlight was crowded, but not overwhelming, and it smelled better, in the clean, fruity way only gay bars can smell as a point of honor. The after-theater crowd who'd made it down from Broadway to the East Village were leaving, and the locals and Brooklyners were settling in. A few of them whistled at Eden, but Julia went unnoticed up to the bar. "Three cosmopolitans," she requested, and then settled in to wait, two people deep in the bar, for an eternity. At least that kept them from drinking too much.


Eden appeared at her side, took her hand, and said, "I think there's someone I know." She surveyed the crowd and then took off, squeezing past people. Julia followed her because to do otherwise would mean letting go of her hand. The blonde--that blonde--was talking to a tall, bald woman in leather. She flashed Eden a quick smile as Eden came up.


Eden kissed her cheek and said, "This is my friend, Julia Murney. Julia, this is Kendra."


Julia waved with her free hand.


Kendra nodded, and then gestured to her tall companion. "This is Tank."


Tank offered her hand to Eden, and then Julia. Kendra turned her back slightly to Julia and asked something of Tank Julia couldn't hear over the eurotrash beat coming through the speakers. Eden rubbed her thumb along Julia's fingers.


"Cosmos," she mouthed at Eden, and they began the trek back to the bar.


Shoshana was there, having claimed her drink. She said, almost yelling, "This place is so much better."


"What?" Eden yelled back.


"Awesome," Shoshana yelled.


Julia smirked. She took a sip of her drink and couldn't help thinking that Eden's friend, who was also Joe's friend and Andrew's friend, was a little rude. Abrupt. She wrinkled her nose. The cosmopolitan tasted watery. Eden was quiet, studying the bottles above the bar, and Julia tried to remember why they were all here, kind of tipsy and kind of miserable.


Then she remembered.


"Hi," someone said next to her shoulder.


Julia jumped. The drink sloshed over her hand. She turned cautiously. Kendra stood next to her. She had a faint smile, and her gaze flickered away from Julia's when Julia looked at her fully. She said, "Sorry about Tank. She's the wife of a producer and I'm trying to get an audition and..." Her voice trailed off. Julia nodded. Kendra said, "Anyway, would you like to dance?"


"Dance?" Julia wiped her damp hand on her pants and said, "Here?"


"There's room in the back. Eden's mentioned you, but we've never met. I'd like to get to know you. We could just talk."


Kendra said a lot with each sentence. Julia wondered if the bar were quieter, she'd say even more. She shrugged. "Sure," she said. She put her drink down on the bar and gave Eden's shoulder a squeeze. Kendra led her into the sea of bodies. "Did you know we'd be here tonight?" Julia asked.


Kendra shook her head. "Just Tank," she said. They found a spot in the back room near a wall, where the music thudded under their feet.


"Come here often?" Julia asked.


"Yes," Kendra said. "But I've never seen you."


"This was Shoshana's idea."


"Bean?"

Julia had to think. "Yes," she said. Kendra nodded, and looked past her. Julia said, "Eden says you're an actress." She was a master conversationalist.


"Yeah," Kendra said. She seemed to hesitate, and then furrowed her brow. She said, "I'm going on tour in a couple of months."


Julia said, "Eden mentioned."  She tried to figure out how to not mention Eden every three seconds. First step. Stop talking. She bit into her tongue.


They weren't dancing, but the beat was insistent enough that they were kind of swaying, like standing in a fast subway car. Kendra moved gracefully, and Julia followed her. Their heights were so well matched that it was easy to look at her, and hard to look anywhere else. Julia thought about Toronto, the Vancouver of Broadway. She asked, "With Stephanie, right?"


Kendra grinned, which lit up her entire face. "Yeah. She's amazing. Stunning and completely sweet."


Julia nodded. "She's a good friend."


The music changed. Something smokey and slow by the Indigo Girls came on. Kendra stepped closer to Julia, and touched her shoulder, and then her jaw. Julia's senses tingled. Her internal elf-defense mechanism activated, but only at alert status. She didn't move under Kendra's touches, but she did finally find the presence of mind to say, "What is it?" to question Kendra's intense study of her face.


"You're incredibly beautiful."


"I'm what?"


"It's hard to see, at first." Kendra's fingers pushed into her cheek, below her right eye. Julia drew back. Kendra said, "Eden didn't mention that--"


Of all the thoughts that spun through Julia's mind, "Eden didn't mention?" was the one that escaped her lips.


Kendra laughed. She dropped her hand back to Julia's shoulder. A hand touched hers, on Julia. Julia felt pawed at. She and Kendra looked together at Eden, standing next to them, working her way halfway between them. "Can I cut in?" Eden asked.


Kendra took a step back quickly. Eden slid her arm around Julia's waist.


Shoshana appeared, nearly pouncing Kendra from behind, encircling her shoulders and shaking her from side to side. Julia was momentarily terrified. Kendra laughed. She slapped at Shoshana's hands.


"Cosmo?" Shoshana purred into Kendra's ear.


"Beer," Kendra hissed back. Shoshana dragged her toward the bar.


Julia wrapped her arms around Eden and pulled her close enough to talk to her without yelling. She said, "Kendra's a little weird."


"She is not," Eden said. She kissed Julia's cheek and chuckled into her ear.


"How does Shoshana know her?"


"Oh, I don't know. Some benefit. Sho's been trying to get her into Hairspray forever."


"It hasn't taken?"

Eden shook her head. She said, "Something about Rent."


Julia looked over at the bar, where Shoshana dangled a cherry above Kendra's head. "She's doing Wicked," she said.


"I told you months ago. Does that bother you?"


"I thought it would be somebody else," Julia said.


"Who?"


Julia shrugged. "Her spontaneity is--It's like Judy Holliday has been resurrected."


"Who's Judy Holliday?"


"We are not speaking," Julia said.


Eden put her head on Julia's shoulder. She asked, "Okay. But can we go now?"


"Yes. Thank God."


They left, giving Shoshana a little wave as they passed the bar. Shoshana stuck her tongue out at them. Outside, Eden said, "Come to my place."


"What?"


"It's 2 A.M., and you'd have to go all the way across the bridge..." Eden's voice faltered. She put her hands in her pockets. "You could see Idina in the morning when the gates of hell open."


"Okay," Julia said. "But wherever I end up, I'm going to just pass out. I could take off my clothes for you, if you wanted, but then I am going to pass out."


Eden gave her a small smile, and took her elbow. She said, "You can protect me on the subway."


"I want you to know that I am totally incapable of doing that."


Eden said, "Then we'll die together."


Julia didn't say anything else until they got onto the subway, sitting too close in an empty car, huddling against the grafitti and the dirty floor. She didn't want to ruin the mood created by the most cheesy, compellingly romantic thing anyone had ever said to her. Maybe Eden had even meant it.


They were walking down a narrow, clean, well-lit hallway before Julia said, "I've never been here."


Eden smiled. She said, "Mind the dirty clothes."


"Do you have any pets?"


"Are you allergic?"


"No."


"No pets. Not since--the incident."


Julia raised her eyebrows. Eden unlocked the door and Julia followed her inside. A lamp was on by the window, casting dim light through the room. The apartment was an L-shaped efficiency, with the kitchen and the bed nook in back. Eden, instead of having a couch, had a large dining room table in the center of the room, and an overstuffed chair in the corner.


"Nice table," Julia said.


"Great for readings," Eden said.


"At your apartment?"


"Anywhere I can get them," Eden said.


Julia wasn't sure where to sit, so she wandered to the kitchen and peeked inside, and then looked at the books on Eden's bookshelves. She said, "We've never done readings."


"We've never been cast together," Eden said.


Julia wandered to the bed nook. Pictures of Eden's family were on the bedside table. A poster of Disneyland, covered in signatures, hung on the side wall. Julia tried to read some of them, and then gave up and just searched for Eden's.


Eden cleared her throat.


Julia turned around. Eden sat on the edge of the bed. She'd taken off her shoes and her jacket. Julia squeezed her hands together. She said, "I was trying to find you."


"I'm right here," Eden said.


Julia said, "Forest. Trees." She took off her jacket. Her hands shook. She put it on Eden's dresser, and then said, "I really--I don't have to stay if you've changed your mind."


"I haven't," Eden said.


Julia met Eden's gaze. She sat on the bed, and as Eden searched her face, kissed her. Her hand reached up for Eden's cheek. Eden leaned into her lips, kissing her back. Julia's lips parted to gasp, and Eden's tongue was there, slipping inside. Arousal surged through Julia. She met Eden's tongue with her own, and Eden's withdrew. Eden whimpered against her mouth.


"Stay," Eden asked.


Julia drew back, blinking in the low light, focusing again on Eden's wide eyes and her damp lips, glistening with kisses. She said, "I'm not going anywhere."


Eden kissed her. She grabbed Julia's shoulders, holding Julia in place while she attacked her lips. Julia allowed Eden's kisses. She sucked Eden's tongue when it invaded her mouth, and Eden mewled, pulled back, and then thrust her tongue in again. Julia settled her hands on Eden's waist. Each kiss stoked her arousal, and she moved against Eden, seeking to quench it. Eden bit into her lower lip and tugged on it with her teeth. Julia groaned. She wrenched her mouth away from Eden. Eden followed, placing sloppy kisses on her lips and cheeks.


Julia tugged at Eden's shirt. She freed it from Eden's waistband and slipped her hands underneath. "Yes," Eden purred. Her hand went behind Julia's head, and pinned her against gentle kisses. Julia's hands moved higher. She found the back of Eden's bra and unclasped it. "God," Eden said against her mouth. Julia put her hand under the loosened cup and squeezed Eden's breast. Eden tossed her head back, panting. Julia gulped for air. Her lips were swollen and almost numb from kissing.


She urged Eden back on the bed, until Eden's hair fanned out on the comforter. Eden gave her a wild smile as she leaned down and kissed Eden's lips lightly, and then her cheeks, and then her eyelids.  Eden tasted of alcohol and smoke. Julia rubbed her thumb over Eden's taut nipple. Eden struggled underneath her, pushing at her shoulders.


"What?" Julia asked, trying to give Eden space without falling off the bed.


"Take off my shirt," Eden said.


Julia's hand stilled on Eden's breast. She inhaled through her nose, exhaled slowly through her mouth, and said, "Maybe we should stop."


"After you take off my shirt."


Julia squinted.


Eden laughed, and pushed Julia off of her. Julia managed to sit up on the bed. Eden grabbed her shoulder and hauled herself up. She pulled her shirt over her head, and tossed her bra on the floor. Julia's gaze went to her bare chest. Eden crossed her arms, and then uncrossed them. Julia's line of sight moved upward. Eden smiled at her. Julia scooted closer and kissed Eden. She took Eden into her arms, and Eden put one hand on her chest, above her breast, and sighed into her mouth.


"You know," Eden murmured, "None of this would have happened if Idina hadn't gotten hurt."


"I believe that all she would ask in our gratitude is the details," Julia said.


Eden giggled. Julia kissed her lightly, and then kissed her hair. She said, "It's 3 A.M."


"I know."


"Matinee."


"I'd--forgotten that part," Eden said.


"I'm older and wiser."


"Sexier. More experienced," Eden said.


Each word seemed connected to Julia's groin. She swallowed, and tried not to look down. "Um," she said.


"I have nightshirts in the bottom drawer. If you want to, uh."


"Thanks," Julia said. She got up so quickly that Eden tumbled into the space she'd left as the bed shifted.


The shirt she chose had Daffy Duck on it. She glanced over her shoulder to see Eden pushing down her jeans. She looked away again, and pulled off her own shirt and bra, and left them piled, as neatly as Eden had, on the floor. She kicked off her pants before putting on the night shirt.


"Nice ass," Eden said.


"I work out." Julia turned around. Eden was under the covers, sitting up against the pillows. The comforter was tucked up to her armpits and her arms were folded. Julia slipped under the covers. Eden reached for the lamp.


"Is there a night light?" Julia asked, as the room was cast into darkness. A pinprick of white light shown at the floor near the bathroom, and across from it against the wall were the green, flickering points of Eden's computer.


"Yes," Eden said.


Julia scooted closer, finding Eden in the dark. They kissed, hard and lingering. Eden threaded her fingers through Julia's hair and tugged her closer. Julia curled against her, tossing one leg over Eden's, and they kissed until Julia could hardly breathe and Eden was just pressing lazy, wet circles to her cheek and neck. Julia tucked her head against Eden's shoulder. Eden sighed. She turned on her side, pressing her back to Julia's torso. Julia's hand splayed against her waist. Eden caught it, and drew it lower. Julia's hand touched Eden's panties. Heat rose through the cotton, into her fingers. She curled two fingers against Eden.


Eden let out a choked gasp. Her back went rigid against Julia. Her hand squeezed Julia's. Julia thought about what to say, to pull them back from this, but she couldn't think of anything. So she stroked Eden, pushing through the panties. Eden kicked her, and then said, "Sorry."


Julia laughed against her ear. She kissed Eden's neck and then moved her hand inside Eden's panties. She had no idea where to touch, what Eden liked, what Eden wouldn't like, but Eden's hand was still there, guiding her. She rubbed two fingers along either side of Eden's clit, the tips brushing Eden's lower lips. Eden arched back, nearly knocking heads with her, and let out a whimpering cry. "Please," she said. "More."


Julia cupped Eden, applying pressure with her whole hand. "Like that?" She asked, surprised at how rough her voice sounded.


"Yes," Eden said. She let go of Julia's hand and grabbed her wrist instead, holding onto her. She was quivering and Julia tried to hold her. She put her free hand under Eden's neck and held her chest. Eden gasped, and said, "Middle finger." Julia stroked her middle finger across Eden's clit.


Eden cried out. She bucked against Julia's hand, and then clenched her thighs. Her breath stopped, and then she was panting, sagging forward, burying her face in a pillow. Julia stayed curled around her, and whispered to her. Eden's sweat soaked her nightshirt. She slid her hand back to Eden's belly. Eden twitched, and then mumbled something into the pillow.


"What?" Julia asked.


"That was nice," Eden said, louder. She turned her head, inhaling fresh air. Her eyes caught the night light and shone black. Julia could faintly make out that she was smiling. "Sleep," Julia said.


"Julia..."


Julia closed her eyes. She relaxed against Eden's body, and said, "I promise things won't be different in the morning."


* * *


The alarm clock sounded like a four alarm fire. Julia screamed and threw the covers off. "Jesus, Eden!"


Eden rolled over and slapped the clock. The noise stopped. Julia clutched her head.


"Sorry," Eden said. "I'm a heavy sleeper."


"Really?" Julia said. Her eyes were still closed. She opened one and peeked at the clock. The clock face read 11:00 A.M. The machine was silent. Julia still didn't trust it. "Is it really eleven?"


"Yes. It's my last chance alarm. I'm late for the matinee already," Eden said. She rolled onto her back and stretched.


"I am not a morning person. That is why I became an actress."


"It's not really morning. It's more like brunch," Eden said.


"Are we having brunch?"


Eden propped herself up on one elbow and grinned at Julia. She said, "We could."


Julia contemplated food. She liked melon. Waffles, though, were overrated. Eggs--


"Or," Eden said, interrupting her thoughts. "We could have sex."


Julia shifted, rolling over to frown at Eden. Eden kissed her nose. Julia tilted her chin and found Eden's lips.


The phone rang.


Julia groaned.


Eden kissed her gently and then rolled over to pick up the receiver. "Eden," she said. Julia gazed at her bare back. She reached out to trace Eden's spine with the tip of her finger. Eden giggled into the phone, and then said, "No, I am not having sex."  She paused. "Shoshana. No."


"She's not stupid," Julia said sleepily. She rolled onto her back and closed her eyes.


"Shoshana. Yes." A pause. "She wants to talk to you."


Julia groped in Eden's direction. Eden handed her the phone. "What?" Julia asked.


"I cannot believe you had sex with Eden," Shoshana said.


"I did not have sex with--Look, why are you calling?"


"Brian told me you didn't even like girls."


"When did you--Why did you ask Brian if I liked--Why are you calling?"


Eden was laughing so hard she was soundless and shaking the whole bed with her spasms. Julia glared at her.


Shoshana said, "Idina's been released. She's here, actually, asleep on the couch. And high as a fucking kite."


"Oh," Julia said.


"Are you coming?" Shoshana asked.


"I have a reading," Julia said.


"Then you're late."


"Extremely."


"Put Eden on the phone."


Julia thrust the phone at Eden, who put it to her ear and giggled into it. "Goodbye, Shoshana," she said, and dropped the phone on the floor. Then she sat up and said, "Shoshana thinks Jennifer is going to bite her during the show."


"Where?"


"I don't know. Maybe on the ear?"


"No, which part?"


"I don't know where Jen does her biting. Shoshana bites during--" She stopped, and frowned at Julia, and said, "I shouldn't be telling you this."


Julia scowled.


Eden leaned down and traced Julia's lips with her fingertip. She said, "I should be doing other things."


Julia had had sufficient time to wake up, and now Eden's finger was igniting her senses. Her skin tingled where Eden touched her. She thought about using Eden's technique of just showing Eden precisely where she ached the most, but she was still too drowsy to move, so she let Eden kiss her throat, and then slide down her body, cupping her breasts through the nightshirt, and then straddling her thighs.


Eden smiled down at her. Julia smiled back, and said, "I told you nothing would change."


"Definitely wiser," Eden said, squirming lower. Her fingers settled onto Julia's bare thigh.


"We weren't drunk at all last night, were we?"


Eden dug her nails into Julia's skin. Julia arched. Eden said, "No."


"And I'm not drunk this morning," Julia said.


"I hope not. I don't keep liquor in the apartment," Eden said.


"Why not?"


"Religious reasons."


"Really?"


Eden had settled between Julia's legs, and was urging them apart. She looked up at Julia and frowned, and said, "Can we talk about this later?"


"I want to get to know you."


Eden blushed.


"Are you any good at Scrabble?"


"I'm a singer."


Julia rolled her head to the side and regarded Eden.


"I'm good with my mouth," Eden said, and blushed so furiously that Julia resolved to shut up.


But her tongue, of its own accord, made her say, "I learned that last night."


Eden said, "There's more."


Julia threw her arm over her mouth and bit into her wrist. Eden laughed. She said, "Can you take off you--um."


"Religious reasons?" Julia asked, pushing herself into a sitting positions.


"No, I'm just shy," Eden said.


"Hardly," Julia said. She stood up, using Eden's hand to balance. Eden's fingers quivered against hers. She said, "You just want me to strip. Well, that's okay. I've stripped before."


Eden gave her a smile and perched on the edge of the bed.


Julia pulled the Daffy Duck nightshirt over her head and tossed it behind her. She reached for her panties but Eden grabbed her wrists and stopped her. Eden kissed her stomach, and then lower, leaving a wet path across her hip. Eden's teeth grazed her waistband. Julia coughed and said, "You don't seem shy."


Eden laughed. She kissed Julia's belly button and then slid down her panties. Julia stepped out of them. Eden straightened up and kissed her mouth. Julia circled her waist. Eden's breasts pillowed against hers. Julia bit at Eden's lips. Eden wriggled away from her embrace and then pushed her toward the bed. Julia landed on her bare ass, and then yelped as Eden grabbed her knees. Eden pushed her legs apart.


"God," Julia said, falling back onto her elbows. Her legs brushed Eden's shoulders.


"I haven't even touched you," Eden said, distractedly, as she stared between Julia's legs.


"You don't have to," Julia said.


"I can tell."


Julia tried to cross her legs, but Eden held them apart. Her arm muscles flexed attractively, and Julia gazed at the slope of her shoulders, and then furrowed her brow. "Eden, stop staring."


"Okay." Eden kissed her instead. Her tongue darted out and lapped against Julia's clit. Julia covered her face. She'd been wet since she'd woken up, and Eden's teasing had left her aching. Eden could taste it, she was sure. Could see that she was already shamelessly swollen. Eden's tongue, pointed and firm, circled her clit, and then Eden said, muffled by her legs, "Tell me."


Julia groaned.


Eden's mouth withdrew. Julia groped for her head, and found her hair. She said, "Inside." Eden bit her inner thigh. "Eden."


Eden blew across her and asked, hesitantly, "Say my name again?"


"Eden. God, Eden. Please."


Eden bent to Julia. Her tongue traced Julia's entrance and then slipped inside. Julia nearly screeched, biting into her wrist. Eden's tongue circled her again, buzzed against her clit, and then pushed into her again. The rough texture of her tongue sensitized Julia's flesh. Eden dug her fingers into Julia's thighs. Julia came. She spasmed against Eden, and Eden held her legs, kept kissing her, guiding her through the orgasm, until Julia pulled away on the bed, shivering.


Eden crawled onto the bed and fell on top of her. Julia laughed.


"Are you okay?" Eden asked.


"Never better," Julia said.


The phone rang.


"I'm late," Eden said.


"I know."


Eden kissed her temple and then crawled off of her to find the phone. Julia closed her eyes.


* * *


February, 2005


Julia was halfway through the act before she found Eden in the crowd. She wasn't sure whether nerves had blinded her, or if Eden had come late. Her hands were sweating all over the microphone, and she'd cried through the last song. It was hard to see. Eden smiled at her when their eyes met, and gave a little wave. Julia licked her lips. She hadn't seen Eden since Idina's accident. Lennon was taking her to San Francisco in a month and a half, and Brooklyn, despite its audience, kept Eden busy for eight shows a week. It didn't really matter. Whenever she and Eden were in the same room, Eden was all she saw.


After the show, Eden disappeared, and Julia kept straining her neck, looking above the thinning crowd. Her mother gave her funny looks, which she ignored. Eden appeared after Seth left. Julia raised her eyebrows. Eden hooked her arm through Julia's. Julia's mother gave her another funny look.


"Oh, this is Eden. Eden, this is my mom."


"Anne," Anne said, offering her hand to Eden.


Eden distangled herself from Julia and shook it. She asked, "You said cocktober in front of your mother?" Then she covered her mouth. "And I said cocktober in front of your mother. Again."


"Cocktober," Julia said. "Always a crowd pleaser."


Anne smiled. She said, "She was actually proud when she came home and told us about that gig."


"I was not."


"Well, your father was," Anne said.


Julia smiled. She put her hand on Eden's shoulder.


Anne leaned in and kissed Julia's cheek, and then said, "Your father's waiting with the car. Congratulations, honey."


Julia smiled and waved, and when Anne was through the door, she turned and hugged Eden as hard as she could.


"Your mom is totally mom-like," Eden said against Julia's hair.


"Imagine when I was 13."


Eden chuckled.


"Come home with me?" Julia said.


"To Jersey?"


Julia frowned.


Eden smiled and kissed her. She said, "Tonight is yours."


"But after that--I don't know when I'll see you again," Julia said. She wanted Lennon and she wanted Eden. Losing either one would kill the other.


"It doesn't matter," Eden said, and kissed her again. "It doesn't matter."


END