"An hundred years should go to praise

Thine eyes and on thy forehead gaze;

Two hundred to adore each breast,

But thirty thousand to the rest;

An age at least to every part,

And the last age should show your heart.

For, Lady, you deserve this state,

Nor would I love at lower rate."

-- Andrew Marvell, To His Coy Mistress

Sometimes the weight was too much. All their expectations, all their hopes. She could see it in their eyes when they looked at her. They could hear it in their voices when they casually brought the subject up over dinner. But they didn't flat-out ask anymore. The last time had been Vala's breakdown at the three-month point. It had taken both Daniel and Landry to get her calmed down and off the table. "You said three months," Vala had sobbed as they walked her from the commissary. "You said!"

Sam knew what she'd said. She could hear herself saying it in her head all the time. Giving hope, giving them a promise and then being forced to back out of it. Being forced to tell them she had no idea how to save them. She had known her plans wouldn't work from the two-week point. Every moment since had been one insane idea after another, countless projections that all ended with their death.

McKay had called her an artist, a maestro. Now she was starting to think he had the right idea. Call a problem impossible, deny you have the ability to fix it. When you succeed, you're treated like a hero. When you fail, well... no one can claim you gave them false hopes. No one can hold it against you when you finally lose.

The doors behind her slid open and Cameron came inside. She didn't have to look. When there were only five other people in your world, you quickly learned to distinguish footsteps, gait, the sound of breathing. She kept staring out the window at the world below them. After a moment, Cameron said, "Hey."

"Hi," she said. The ship was oppressively silent. The slight hum of the engines had long ago faded into background noise and the ship was so large that she could live days in silence. All the better to hear her demons with, she thought.

Cameron walked to the control panel and scanned the readout. "I've been trying to learn how to read this stuff. Asgard."

"Yeah?" she said.

He nodded. "I had a better time in French class. But that may have just been because of Mrs. Mobley, the teacher."

Sam smiled and leaned her head against the window frame. "I miss my house," she whispered. He didn't comment, so she continued, "I always kind of saw it as a place to keep my stuff. A place to sleep when I didn't sack out at the base. But it's been a year, Cam. I miss my house."

He walked up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. She closed her eyes and felt her breath catch. Something as simple as human contact was enough to send a shockwave through her. There were five other people on-board, sure. But the casual brushes - handshakes, bumping someone in the corridor, a hug - were all but forgotten. It had been months since someone had touched her and she felt the weight of Cameron's hand holding her down, cementing her in place. She slid her hand over his and hoped he felt some of the same.

A moment later, he stepped closer. His chest pressed against her back and his hand slid down to her collar. She sagged against him almost involuntarily, her body seeming to awaken. Contact, pressure, another body against hers. She would have taken a handshake, but this was would do.

They'd all had a change of clothes onboard and she'd used them to replicate casual outfits for them. She was wearing a low-cut blue blouse and his fingers slid across the neckline. She arched her back to his touch, her skin rising with goosebumps in his trail. She shuddered and reached back, her hand finding his hip. He lowered his lips to her neck and brushed his tongue along her skin.

Her eyelids fluttered down and she moved her hand to one side. Fortunately, he was wearing sweatpants and his cock was easy to find. She'd considered Cameron as a lover before, but she had never wanted to endanger the welfare of the team. But things had definitely changed. They'd been trapped on a spaceship for over a year. It had been her idea, it had been her responsibility to free them and she'd failed. It was a bad idea and she'd doomed them all to a slow, lingering death. The least she could do was offer him a bit of comfort.

"Sam," he said, his voice tight and his breath warm against her ear. "You... should stop doing that if you don't want to..."

"I do," she whispered. She squeezed him again and moved her free hand to her slacks. She undid the catch and pushed them down.

Cameron groaned and moved his hand to her breast. He squeezed it gently, almost experimentally, and pressed himself tighter against her. "Let go," he whispered. Sam reluctantly released his erection and pressed her palm against the window. Cameron eased her pants down to her knees and cupped her ass with his free hand. She felt his cock against her thigh and leaned her head back against his shoulder.

He slipped inside her easily, as wet as she was from his simple touches. He was big, harder, than she would have imagined, and she realized that the simple contact had made an impression on him, too. They'd have to be careful about small gestures like touching and kissing. She swallowed and put her hand between her legs to find her clit. She touched herself as Cameron thrust into her, rolling her clit, groaning when he hit a particularly sensitive spot, arching her back and pressing her ass tight against him. He put one hand on her ass and lightly slapped it with his fingertips.

Sam whimpered and said, "Harder..."

Permission granted, Cameron spanked her with the palm of his hand. She groaned and brought both arms up in front of her face. She crossed them at the wrist, pressed her face against the spot where they met and ground her hips against his. "Harder..."

Cameron abandoned her breast and slapped her ass with his dominant hand. He grunted as she cried out and his hips sped up. Her legs were shaking, her knees weak. When he came, he grabbed her hips and drew her against him. "Cam, no," she whispered.

"It's all right, Sam..." His hand moved to her head. He put his fingers over her mouth and she sucked them. His orgasm spent, he groaned and slipped from her.

Sam sagged against the wall and pulled her pants back up, fastening them without stepped away from the window. Cameron pressed his face into the back of her head, inhaled her hair and then kissed the back of her neck. He left without another word and Sam finally walked back to the console.

As she searched the Asgard library for information on a morning-after pill, she realized she hadn't seen Cameron's face once during the love-making. She pulled her feet up onto the chair and hugged her knees, watching as the database scrolled across the screen. Just another day in paradise.

~

They didn't sleep together or plan their times together. One of them would seek the other out, they'd shut the door and begin to undress. At the beginning, Sam had refrained from kissing on the lips. It made it feel too intimate, too real. Their relationship was release, comfort, a bit of human contact to keep themselves from going mad.

Cameron had relented to her pregnancy fears - how could they possibly consider bringing a child into this hell? - and stopped coming inside of her. She had learned to swallow when she gave him a blow job and he had started to enjoy washing her skin with a warm, wet rag when he came on her. Once or twice a month, they showered together and he went down on her.

It wasn't perfect, but it was as close as she'd get with her options. Hell, even if they'd been on Earth, she would have welcomed their arrangement.

She realized with a lurch that she wasn't homesick anymore. Homesickness was a feeling that faded gradually and left behind it an empty hole. When you stopped wanting, what was left? Hopelessness? She divided her free time between Cameron, eating and sleeping. Every other spare minute was spent at the controls, working her 'magic.' Magic that had failed her.

One night after too many calculations had ended with nothing and after too many fruitless ideas had fizzled, she left the lab early. She wanted to sleep, wanted to bury her head in the pillow and cry, but there would be time for that. She wanted to be abused a little. She knew Cameron had an affinity for roughness, but he tempered it when he was with her. She changed direction and headed for his quarters.

She would let him do whatever he wanted to her. Spank her, slap her, rape her. She needed the rage, needed to have a welt or two. It felt less like self-mutilation to let someone else do it to her.

She hit the chimes on Cameron's door and walked inside without invitation. It was their habit; a cursory knock before entering. This time, she should have waited for his response.

As it was, she walked in on quite the scene. Cameron was lying on the couch, arms spread across the back of the seat. He was bare-chested, his pants around his thighs. Teal'c knelt before him, head bowed and shoulders working up and down in an unmistakable motion. Neither of them had heard the chime.

"Cam," she said.

His eyes opened and he looked at her. His dog tags glistened on his chest, almost winking at her, and he kept his mouth closed. He didn't try to explain, but Teal'c stilled his movements. He lifted his head and turned to look over his shoulder at Sam. His lips were wet, his eyes glazed with desire. They stared at her without guilt or embarrassment.

She blinked and realized she wasn't the only one craving human contact, wasn't the only one who might get turned on by an innocent touch. Six people on board, two of them in a basically committed relationship... monogamy was an unfortunate victim of their circumstance.

"I can come back," she said.

"You don't have to," Cameron said.

Sam looked at Teal'c's lips, at Cameron's achingly hard cock. She stood in the doorway for a long time and finally shook her head. "No. I... I can come back." She turned and walked out. As the doors slid shut behind her, she could hear Cameron's groan as Teal'c returned to work.

Later that night, Cameron slipped into her bed. She hadn't heard his knock, hadn't heard the door open. She was curled on her side and he spooned against her back. His cock was already out and hard, the warm stretch of skin against her back telling her he'd undressed on his way across the room. He slid into her, put a hand on her stomach and quickly fucked her to orgasm. He kissed her earlobe, moved his hand down to her clit and fingered her until she came.

Her tears moistened the pillow and, when he brushed his lips across her cheek, he felt them. He didn't ask what was wrong, didn't suggest staying the night. He cupped her breast and instead whispered, "Will you be all right?"

She nodded. He turned her head and kissed her lips. Sam moaned into his mouth and arched her back to press her breast into his hand. It was their first kiss. He'd been inside of her, had come on most of her flesh, had fucked her in every way possible, but it was their first real kiss. Sam slipped her tongue into his mouth and sucked the tip, felt it brush across her teeth as he tilted his head.

She rolled onto her back and he settled over her, never lifting his mouth from hers. Sam bent her knees and cradled him between her thighs. Cameron sighed and pressed forward, sinking into her slowly. Sam hooked her ankles behind his back as he thrust into her, a slow, steady rhythm.

Her tears continued to flow, but for different reasons now; this is what it would have been like. If she and Cameron had become lovers through ordinary circumstances, if they had started sleeping together on Earth, this is how it would have been. Tender, sweet, a gentle rise to orgasm, with kissing and soft touches. He kissed her cheek and then her eyelids. Her toes curled and she came with soft, shuddering gasps.

Cameron slipped out of her and she wrapped her hands around his cock. They looked into each other's eyes as she stroked him to orgasm, his come spreading across her fingers and stomach. He kissed her again and walked to the bathroom for a wet rag. Sam lay back and let him clean her. As he ran her rag between her legs, she closed her eyes. "Are you okay?" he whispered.

She nodded. She still didn't mean it, but she was closer to the truth than she had been before. He stroked her hair with his wet hand and kissed her lips again. He slid off the bed and dressed in the darkness. He didn't say good-bye when he left and Sam didn't expect him to. She rolled onto her side, flipped the pillow over to the dry side and fell into a restless dream.

~

They only saw Vala and Daniel at meals. For the first few months of their relationship, Vala had been as happy as a lark. She'd draped herself across Daniel, tried to feed him, ruffled his hair and did everything but straddle him right there at the table. But after a while, the feeling of conquest wore off and she fell back into a more comfortable persona. She was still enamored with Daniel, their sex lives still strong - if Cameron's reports of what he heard when he ran by their quarters were to be believed - but she was much easier to live with once she got used to the fact Daniel had accepted her. And after she realized she didn't have to hang onto him every spare second, she started to socialize a bit more.

General Landry had done a bit of calculating between his horticultural exploration and discovered it would be Christmas in Earth time. He stopped short of making the celebration an order, but everyone sensed it would be a good idea. Sam showed Daniel and Teal'c how to operate the replicator so they could make decorations while she continued to work on what she'd come to call the Problem At Hand.

Vala had been learning to bake after tasting Mrs. Mitchell's pie. Nothing she'd made yet had come close to a lifetime of baking practice, but she was better than Sam. They took up the kitchen with replicated supplies and prepared a massive Christmas dinner.

Sam ran her thumb through the chocolate frosting and licked it. Everything still tasted like those little reprocessed cubes Thor had once gotten her to try, but she was finding the taste was growing on her. And, to her surprise, the yellow ones were pretty damn good. Fortunately, they'd figured out how to make the little cubes look like actual Earth food, so aesthetically it was no different than a real Christmas dinner.

"So?" Vala asked as she pushed the oven door shut. "What do you want for Christmas?"

"Nineteen scientists and a fully-charged ZPM," Sam said.

"I know the song about five golden rings," Vala said. "Is that a different version?"

Sam smiled. "No. I'd like to have a group of scientists to help me with this damn time-dilation thing. I keep thinking the answer is right there and I just... can't figure it out."

"Have you been getting laid?"

Sam coughed on the piece of bread she'd been chewing on. "What?"

Vala shrugged. "Sometimes it helps. Clears the cobwebs, opens your mind." When Sam still didn't answer, Vala said, "Oh, come on. There are six of us here. You don't think there are already rumors?"

"Yes," Sam said. "Happy?"

Vala's eyes sparkled with delight. "Who? General Landry? Cameron?" Something in Sam's face must have given her away because Vala gasped. "Good for you! So? Is he any good in bed?"

"It's just sex," Sam said. She felt a blush rising in her cheeks. She couldn't believe she was discussing this with anyone, let alone Vala. She looked over her shoulder and said, "It's a stress reliever. Nothing more."

"Right," Vala said.

"I'm not even the only person Cameron's sleeping with."

Vala's eyes danced. There were a finite number of suspects aboard and the two female options were right there. That meant Cameron was... "Really..." Vala said. She gasped and said, "Teal'c?"

Sam nodded reluctantly. "I'm not sure we should be talking about this. So... why don't we just go back to cheerier topics?"

"Like the time-dilation field," Vala said.

"Point taken," Sam said. She turned and resumed chopping carrots. "So what's Daniel like in bed?"

To her horror, Vala wasn't the least bit shocked and proceeded to reveal everything.

~

Sam was hooking on an earring when the door chimed. It didn't immediately open, which meant it wasn't Cameron dropping off an 'early Christmas present.' "Come in," she said without looking away from the mirror. Vala stepped inside and Sam smiled. "Hi, Vala."

"Sam." She walked over and said, "You look lovely tonight."

"Thank you, Vala. You do, too."

Vala stopped behind Sam, standing a little to her left, and examined her own reflection in the mirror. She brushed a hand through her hair as she spoke. "You never told me what you wanted for Christmas, so I had to guess." She held up a small, shiny package. "Merry Christmas, Sam."

Sam took the package and said, "Hmm. I wonder which of the presents I helped replicate this is..."

"No," Vala said. "I knew you were observing, so you'd see pretty much every present replicated. This is something else."

"Oh." She undid the wrapping and lifted the lid off the small box. Nestled on a sheet of Kleenex was a silver barrette with three small sapphires and a . Sam had admired it on more than one occasion in Vala's hair. "Oh, wow," she said. "Vala, this is..."

"I figured it would look better on you... blue eyes and everything." She smiled and gestured. "Well? Let me put it on for you."

Sam handed the box back to Vala and turned to face the mirror. Vala plucked the comb from the box and used it to rearrange Sam's hair. "You've been letting your hair grow a bit more than usually. You'll need things like this if you keep growing it out."

As Vala combed her hair, Sam caught the reflection of the barrette again. It was small and perfect, the product of manufacturers on Earth rather than an Asgard replicator. The machine made near-perfect copies, no real errors to speak of. But something about them seemed paler. This was new, this was real and it... it was one of the few possessions Vala had brought with her on-board.

She reached up and caught Vala's wrist as she brought the barrette up. "Wait. I-I can't take this, Vala."

"Why not?"

"It's too..." she searched for the right word, "precious. It's something you brought with you from Earth. I can't take it from you."

Vala pulled her wrist out of Sam's grip and turned her to face the mirror. "Nonsense. I want you to have it. It'll look better on you anyway."

Sam watched as Vala pinned the barrette just above her left ear. Vala put her hands on Sam's arms and rested her chin against Sam's shoulder. "There. Doesn't that look lovely?"

Sam had to smile. "Yes, it does. Thank you, Vala." She turned her head and kissed Vala's forehead. Vala straightened her back, brushed her hand through Sam's hair and kissed her lips. Sam smiled and pulled back. Vala's arm was around her, their faces inches apart. She was surprised to see something new in Vala's eyes. Charity. The Vala who'd walked into the SGC four years ago had been all about herself, what life could do for her. Now, even with her entire stockpile of possessions cut down to whatever fit in her pack, she was giving Sam something.

Without thinking about it, without questioning her own motives, Sam leaned in and kissed Vala's lips again. Vala smiled around the kiss and tilted her head, opening her mouth and sweeping her tongue forward. Sam caught the tip of Vala's tongue, sucked it slowly and then offered her own. Vala's hand went to the back of Sam's head and pulled her closer.

Sam opened her eyes and saw Vala staring at her. They broke the kiss and Sam stepped back, slipping out of Vala's grip to get some breathing room. Vala smiled and said, "Well." Her voice was low, breathy. She twirled her fingers through Sam's hair and said, "If I'd known that would be the thank you, I would've given you that barrette years ago. Or... you know... given you something bigger."

Sam shook her head, horrified at what she'd done. "You're with Daniel."

"I've been with women before. Daniel's been with women before..."

"The two of you are in a relationship," Sam said.

Vala rolled her eyes. "Sam, do you want to settle down with me? Get married?"

Sam frowned. "No."

"Then anything we do would be for fun. Stress-relief. Like you and Cameron."

And Teal'c and Cameron, Sam thought bitterly. He gets to mess around, why shouldn't she? Because, no matter how hard she tried to justify it, Vala was with Daniel. "I wouldn't feel right," Sam said. "I'm sorry. I'd feel like I was betraying Daniel."

Vala sighed. "All right. Have it your way. But enjoy the barrette. I really didn't have any ulterior motives."

"I know," Sam smiled. "That's why you got a kiss out of it."

Vala grinned and said, "I'll see you in the commissary? Cameron said he has a surprise for us."

"Yeah. I'll be along soon."

Vala left the room and Sam returned to the mirror. She straightened her hair where Vala had mussed it and turned her head to look at the tiny glint of sapphire near her temple. She smiled, touched her lips and then headed out to the party.

~

There was no countdown, no big ball to drop. They decided General Landry, being the ranking officer, would be the official time keeper for the ship. On New Year's Eve, they gathered on the bridge with champagne. Landry stood in front of the captain's chair and held his watch out in front of him. "Okay, ladies and gentlemen... in five, four, three, two, one..."

"Happy New Year," everyone said. None of them put very much heart into the declaration. After all, a new year just meant one more year stuck on the ship. Sam turned to Teal'c and lightly pecked his lips. "Happy New Year," she said, trying a smile.

"And to you, Colonel Carter," Teal'c replied.

She spotted Vala kissing General Landry after giving Daniel a thorough tongue-lashing. Sam sipped her champagne and glanced out the front window. There, deceptively far away, was the Ori weapon's fire. She shivered and turned away to find Vala making her way over to her. She had been avoiding both Vala and Daniel after that kiss at the Christmas party. Now, though, it looked like she had no excuse but to socialize. She forced a smile. "Hi. Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year," Vala said. She looped an arm around Sam's neck and dipped her. Sam twisted her wrist to keep from spilling her champagne and her left foot went up to balance her weight. Vala kissed her hard, sweeping her tongue across Sam's lips. Since Sam was in the midst of shouting a protest, the invasion was a fait accompli. Sam put her hands on Vala's shoulder and rode out the kiss as best she could.

When Vala finally let her up for air, Sam gasped and stumbled back a step. The men were all, naturally, staring slack-jawed at the display. Vala kept her arm around Sam's shoulders and said, "Well, someone has to spice things up around here." She kissed Sam's cheek and then walked back to Daniel.

Sam looked at Cameron, who raised his eyebrow at her. She hid her smile behind the curve of her glass and hoped she could blame the flush in her cheeks from the champagne.

After the party, Cameron moved off with Teal'c. Sam watched them leave from her position in the captain's chair. Landry had given up a few hours earlier, leaving the bridge to the "kids." Vala stood up and took Daniel's hand, helping him to his feet. "Night, Sam," Daniel said.

"Night."

Vala wrapped her arms around Daniel's waist and rested her head against his back. "Were you planning to stay up a little longer?"

Sam nodded and held up her glass. "At least until I finish this champagne."

"You could finish it in our quarters if you wanted."

Daniel stopped at the door and turned to look at Sam. Sam held her mouthful of champagne and tried to figure out his expression. Hopeful? Wary? She leaned forward and swallowed carefully, swirling the remaining champagne in her glass. "Daniel and I have been friends for a long time," Sam said softly. "I think it would be weird."

"Why don't we ask Daniel what he thinks?" Vala said. She deepened her voice and took on an American accent. "No, Vala, I don't want to have sex with two beautiful women."

Sam coughed and Daniel sheepishly looked away. Vala watched their reactions and rolled her eyes. "Sam, look, we have a finite number of people on board. And if you happen to enjoy the company of the occasional female lover, as I do, there are very few options to be found. The only thing keeping Daniel from--"

"Vala," Daniel said, a hint of warning in his voice.

"--being okay with it is that he thinks it would be weird for you."

"Which it obviously is," Daniel said. "So we'll let it go. Good night, Sam. Happy New Year."

Sam closed her eyes. "Wait."

~

Daniel and Vala sat on the edge of the bed, holding hands and gently kissing. Sam stood at the door, leaning against the wall with her right hand clasped against her upper left arm. Vala had taken off Daniel's dress shirt and released his hand to stroke his chest through his undershirt. Sam tracked his muscles as Vala caressed them, watched as Vala circled his nipple with her fingertips.

Vala broke the kiss and explained, "Daniel loves to have his nipples played with. My tongue, fingers... ice... he loves it." She pinched and Daniel hissed.

"What about you?" Sam asked, her voice shaking. "Are... your nipples sensitive?"

"Show her Daniel," Vala whispered.

Daniel looked at Vala with heavy-lidded eyes and moved his hand to Vala's breast. Vala threw her head back and exposed her throat and Daniel took advantage of it. He lowered his head and licked from the collar of her shirt to her earlobe. His fingers brushed over the curve of her breast, circling her nipple with practiced familiarity.

Sam bit her bottom lip and crossed her legs, pressing her thighs together. Everyone was still fully-dressed, but she was starting to get turned on just by watching their foreplay. She said, "Vala."

Vala opened her eyes and tilted her head to look in Sam's direction.

Sam put her hands on the waistband of her jeans and said, "Watch." She undid the clasp of her pants and pushed them down her hips. Vala pushed Daniel away and said, "Daniel... be a good audience..."

Daniel opened his eyes in time to see Sam cover the crotch of her panties with one hand. Daniel kept his hand on Vala's chest and squeezed. Sam stepped closer and moved her hands to her stomach. "Vala," she said softly.

Vala leaned in and kissed Sam's hip. She ran her tongue across the hot flesh, following the elastic waistband of Sam's panties. She dipped her head and kissed Sam's thighs. Sam touched the top of Vala's head and reached over to stroke Daniel's cheek. His eyes were wide, his pupils dilated as he watched his lover kissed his best friend's stomach. "You're beautiful, Sam," he said. "I've always thought so..."

Sam brushed her thumb over his bottom lip and closed her eyes as Vala's hand slipped between her legs.

"Even if I had a choice," Vala whispered, her lips close enough to Sam's skin to warm it with her breath, "I would've chosen you, Sam." She kissed Sam's navel and pressed her tongue into the dimple. Daniel reached out and slid his hand over the curve of Sam's ass, letting his fingers slip under her panties to caress the skin there. Sam shivered and rolled her head back on her shoulders.

Vala pulled Sam forward until she was forced to spread her legs. She straddled Vala's thighs and sat down, her knees digging into the mattress as Daniel scooted closer. He kissed Sam's neck and squeezed her ass as Vala curled her fingers. She pressed her knuckle against the wet crotch of Sam's panties and made a knocking gesture with her wrist. The knuckle pressed the cotton against Sam's wet pussy lips and she groaned.

Daniel alternated between kissing Vala's neck and sucking Sam's breast through her t-shirt. Vala turned her head and met his lips in a kiss that made Sam's toes curl. She abandoned Sam's crotch and leaned back, stretching out across the mattress. "Undress me, Daniel," Vala instructed.

Daniel went to work. He peeled her t-shirt up, kissing every inch of flesh as it was revealed. Vala wasn't wearing a bra and he took the time to kiss both of her nipples in turn. Sam was mesmerized; by Vala's tight stomach, by her small, dark nipples, by her almost-black eyes, staring at her with undisguised want.

Sam peeled her own t-shirt off and unhooked her bra. Daniel looked up as her breasts came into view and his lips froze on the curve of Vala's breast. Vala lightly tapped Daniel's chin. "Danny. Pay attention, now."

He blinked, looked down at Vala and then reached for his pants. He undid the button and jerked the zipper down, the bulge of his cock straining against his underwear. Sam wasn't surprised by how big he was; there'd been enough gossip among the nurses in the infirmary to prepare her for the sight. She gripped him through his boxers and squeezed, making him hiccup.

Sam smiled, licked her lips and stroked him. He lifted his hips and leaned back, abandoning Vala's nipples. Vala reached up and put her hand on the back of Sam's neck. Her insistent fingers dug in until Sam had no choice but to lean down. She pressed her lips against the curve of Vala's breast. She closed her eyes and used her tongue to search for Vala's nipple. She found it, closed her lips around it and sucked gently as her fingers continued to tease Daniel's cock.

Vala arched her back and smoothed her hands across Sam's shoulders. "Daniel," Vala gasped. She turned her head, bit her lip and looked at her lover. "Fuck Sam."

Daniel looked at Sam, who nodded slightly and released his cock. He slid off the bed and Sam settled on top of Vala. She was trembling when Daniel pulled her panties down and cried out as he brushed her ass with the tip of his cock. She put her hands on Vala's hips and held on tight. She lifted her head so as not to bite down too hard when Daniel...

He thrust forward and filled her. She cried out and Vala lifted her head to kiss Sam's throat in that moment. As Vala licked her neck, Daniel thrust into her with a steady, slow rhythm. Vala put her hand on Sam's hip and Daniel covered it with his own. They held hands as Sam craned her neck, found Vala's lips and kissed her passionately. The lyrics of a song ran through her head - "I kissed a girl" - and she sucked Vala's tongue into her mouth with a passion that surprised both of them.

Daniel grunted and said, "Sam..." He withdrew his cock and she felt his come on her ass and running down the back of her thigh. Vala moved her hand to Sam's ass and ran her fingers through it, gathering it on her fingers and drawing it back to her mouth. She sucked her fingers clean and then resumed kissing Sam with Daniel's taste on her tongue.

With Daniel down for the moment, Sam was turned her focus entirely on Vala. She shifted to one side and let one of her legs slip between Vala's. Vala groaned and bit her lip as Sam's thigh pressed against her. They kissed and Sam dug her knees into the mattress. She rocked her body forward and Vala cried out. Her fingers dug into Sam's hips as she bucked underneath Sam's assault.

From his vantage point at the head of the bed, Daniel wasn't taking the time to blink. He knew when Vala was about to come by the way her jaw trembled, by the way her hands slid up and down Sam's flanks. She wrapped her arms around Sam's waist in a loose hug, arched her back and screamed Sam's name.

Sam lowered her head and began to pepper Vala's face with kisses. After a moment, Vala let her head roll to one side and focused bleary eyes on Daniel. She pointed at him and bit her bottom lip. "You. Get hard again."

Sam laughed. "You order him to..." She turned her head and looked at Daniel's lap. "Good God."

Daniel smiled sheepishly and stroked his fast-growing erection. "What can I say? Strong women."

"I'll keep that in mind, Dr. Jackson," Sam said with a smile.

Daniel got onto his knees and crawled forward to join them.

Later that night, Sam fell asleep between the two lovers. She had her arms wrapped around Vala's waist and one of Daniel's legs was pinned between hers. Vala's hair covered her face like a cloud, but she didn't bother to brush it away. It smelled good, it was soft, it was a nice distraction. And occasionally, Daniel would kiss her shoulder and murmur in his sleep. She wondered if he thought she was Vala and decided it didn't matter.

Nestled between them, she fell asleep without worry of their predicament, without thinking about how she would solve the problem she'd gotten them into. For one night, she had let it slip her mind. She closed her eyes and fell asleep, hoping she could carry her good feelings into the new year.

~

Sam continued to teach herself the cello. It helped clear her mind, helped her focus her thoughts. She occasionally remembered Rodney McKay's comment about her being an artist and smiled. If you could see me now, she thought ruefully. For a while, she didn't make any progress. It took her a long time to realize she was doing it purposefully; deep down, she felt that if she learned to play before she solved the problem it would mean they were in it for the long haul. She would have to admit there was no solution.

So she stopped holding herself back and began practicing in earnest. She composed, she played what she could remember from classical music she'd barely paid attention to, she taught her fingers how to work the strings until the music sounded good to her ears.

In the meantime, she worked on the Problem At Hand. When it came time to retire for the evening, she had three options: Alone, with Cam or with Daniel and Vala. She knew exactly what she was doing every time she let one of them undress her. She was accepting responsibility, trying to accept forgiveness by giving them all something they needed, something she'd deprived them of.

Sometimes Cameron tied her up. He bit her shoulder, slapped her ass, pulled her hair when he came. Other times, he was gentle. It was as if he saw her as two different women and treated each one differently. She didn't care. As long as it gave him some solace, she was happy to take whatever he dished out. He never hit her and never left bruises when he did get a little too rough. He would stop if she asked him to. But most nights, he ended up following Teal'c away from the dinner table.

Sometimes Vala and Sam met without Daniel present. Sam was originally apprehensive about it; threesomes were the closest she'd ever come to a lesbian experience. But, as with the cello, she quickly became comfortable and - according to Vala - very talented at it. When they did meet with Daniel, they did all kinds of things she'd never envisioned herself doing. She wore a strap-on and fucked them both with it, she let them both attack her as if she was unwilling, she let Vala tie her to the mattress and cut her clothes away as she'd planned to do to Daniel when they first met.

The nights she went to bed alone, she allowed herself to feel guilty. To feel like she was being used, but force herself not to care. It was her fault they were trapped here. If not for her stupid idea, Cameron would be on Earth with Amy Vandenberg, Vala and Daniel would be free to explore their kinks with anyone they pleased. It was her fault. It was the least she could do to provide an outlet for them.

She'd started having a recurring dream. In it, she was naked at the console. Vala was perched on top of the monitor, naked and spreading her legs so Sam could see the screen. Sam alternated between licking Vala's pussy and watching the readout. Cameron was usually behind Sam, fucking her in the ass, while Daniel knelt on the floor and went down on her.

And through it all, Sam kept running simulations. Modifying them, watching to see how they would fail. At several points during the dream, Vala, Daniel or Cameron - sometimes all three - would say "That function is not possible."

She always woke weeping.

On the night Teal'c found her on the bridge, she was staring out at the stars. It had gotten to the point where she hardly even saw the Ori weapon's beam anymore. It was just part of the landscape. She was wrapped in a shawl against the cold of the ship. For the past few years, it seemed as if it was getting colder and colder. She wasn't sure if it was age catching up with her or the ship's environmental controls finally crapping out. It didn't matter because, either way, it was a sign that the end was near.

"Colonel Carter."

"Sam," she corrected. "Please, Teal'c.

He bowed slightly. "Sam." He stepped closer and looked out the front window with her. "'A broad and ample road, whose dust is gold, And pavement stars.'"

Sam blinked. "Milton?"

He smiled. "Indeed. General Landry found a book of quotations among the effects left behind by the crew. I have been studying it."

"Oh," she said. "Well, it's certainly apt. Except this road isn't going anywhere." She turned and walked back to the love seat. Daniel and Vala had long ago - five years ago? More? - asked Teal'c to move one of the bench seats out of the commissary and bring it to the bridge so they could look at the stars. Since then, everyone else on board had taken to using the love seat.

Sam sat down and drew the shawl tighter around her shoulders. "Are you cold?" she asked.

"I am not," Teal'c said. He sat next to her and put an arm around her shoulders. She shuddered and leaned against him, grateful for the warmth. She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I don't know the answer," she said suddenly. "Do you realize I've worked on this problem longer than I worked on deciphering the Stargate? Hell, we've been on this ship longer than I was with the Stargate program. And... I'm starting to think we're going to live the majority of our lives here. We're going to die here, Teal'c, because of my idea. Because I can't figure a way out of it.

"Everyone is always looking to me for the answer. I guess I finally failed them. I failed them all with one monumentally stupid idea that is slowly, painfully killing us all." Her tears were falling in a steady stream, dripping from her chin onto his chest. He either didn't notice or didn't care. "It killed our hope first. And now it's letting us die natural deaths instead of giving us the peace of going quickly. I tortured everyone on this ship to death. I should've just let the beam hit us. I should've just let us all die and let that be that. It would have been easier. It would have been compassionate.

"Do you know what I think the worst part is?" Sam asked. "And I've had a long time to consider the pros and cons. The worst part is... no one misses us. We're not mourned or remembered. As far as they know, we're still on our way home from meeting with the Asgard." Her voice softened and she said, "Yeah. I think that's the worst part. Not being missed."

Teal'c's hand tightened on her shoulder and he bent down to kiss the top of her head. Sam remembered the shock of Cam's first touch all those years ago, the first time they'd had sex, and she felt a similar shock at the touch of Teal'c's lips. She turned her head and pressed her lips to the muscles of his shoulder. "Why haven't you ever come to me?" she whispered.

"How do you mean?"

Sam sat up and looked into his face. "Everyone else on this ship has come to me at least once for... gratification." She remembered General Landry's frustrated resignation as he let her undo his uniform trousers. He had never asked, but his face had left little doubt. She'd practically raped him and she could tell he'd been grateful afterward. But things had never been the same between them. "Why haven't you ever come to me?"

He was looking at the stars again. "There is sometimes more than simple gratification," he said simply.

"You and Cameron?"

"He ably satisfies my needs."

"Right," Sam said. She put her head down again and looked out at the stars with him.

His hand moved down her arm and his fingers tightened again. "Sam." She looked up. "There is sometimes more than simple gratification," he repeated. He hooked his free hand under her chin and looked into her eyes for a long moment. He opened his mouth to speak again, then closed his eyes and turned away.

"Teal'c," she said. She sat up and looked at him.

"Daniel and Vala have started a relationship while on-board. I often considered the same, however... I am uncertain whether I would have taken the risk where we not in this predicament. Beginning a relationship would have been admitting I did not believe we would escape. I did not wish to imply a lack of faith in your abilities."

Sam wiped at her cheeks and felt tears. She said, "Teal'c, are you saying you're... in love with me?"

"I could not engage in sexual intercourse with you. I could not bring myself to begin a relationship of any kind with you."

"So you're with Cameron?"

"As are you," he said.

Sam looked out the window and tried to process what Teal'c was saying. "How long have you felt this way?"

"From the time we met, I felt lust for you," he admitted. "It took time before I considered it love. Perhaps... five years."

Sam said, "You've been in love with me for all this time?" She took his hand in hers and squeezed. "Where's Cameron?"

"I believe he is sleeping."

She stood up and held her hand out. He took it and allowed her to pull him up. They walked quietly through the abandoned halls of their prison, hand-in-hand, to Sam's quarters. She didn't turn on the overhead light, instead going to a small lamp in the corner. She turned it on and gestured at the bed. "Sit down."

He did as she instructed. She removed the shawl and stood in front of him. She felt every one of her fifty-six years, in her bones and in her mind. The Samantha Carter men - and a few women, as Vala had demonstrated - had lusted for was gone, replaced with a Samantha Carter that was supposed to be something more. A General, a grandmother, something besides a Colonel and a frustrated astrophysicist.

She stood in front of Teal'c and undid the buttons on her blouse. He watched her, rapt, and inhaled when she slipped the shirt from her shoulders. She was still wearing her tank top, but his eyes danced as if she were standing nude before him. She put her fingers on his jaw and tilted his head up. His lips were pliant against hers and she brushed her tongue across his teeth. He balled his fists in the sheet, apparently unsure whether he could or should touch her.

Her hands moved to his shirt and she knelt. She untucked it and lifted it to bare his stomach. She leaned in and kissed the long-faded scar where his symbiote pouch had once been. His scent washed over her and she drank it in. He smelled of burnt wood and running water, two of the things she missed most about Earth. She pushed his shirt higher and licked his nipples, drawing a shaky breath from him.

She drew her tongue across his chest and nipped at his skin with her teeth. His hands remained at his sides, her only guide were the quiet, strained noises rising from his throat. She leaned back and lifted his shirt over his head, forcing him to lift his arms to remove it. He tossed the shirt across the room and brought his hands to her face. He brushed her bottom lip with his thumb before pulling her to him for another kiss.

His tongue circled hers as he tasted her, his hands moving to her throat, her shoulders and then down to her breasts. Sam gasped and broke the kiss, leaning back to look down at his hand. He squeezed gently and her nipple responded, rising and pressing against the material. He bowed his head and kissed it through the thin material of her top. At the brush of his tongue, Sam moaned and pushed him back.

Teal'c leaned back on his elbows and stared at her as she rose to her feet. She kicked off her shoes and pushed her pants down without bothering to undo them. She pulled off her tank top and stood before him in only a pair of plain, white panties. She felt ancient, unattractive and self-conscious standing there so open like that, but he reached out to her.

He cupped her ass with one hand, drawing her near as he caressed her breast with the other hand. She rolled her head back and moaned as his lips closed around the nipple once more. She straddled his thighs and sat on his lap, willing to let him take the driver's seat for a while. He alternated between her breasts, licking and sucking each nipple until they stood wet, pink and erect under his gaze.

She felt a spark of desire racing through her, a feeling she hadn't felt in ages. With the others, it was about sex. Friction, friction, friction, orgasm. They had their games, they went through the foreplay, but Teal'c... Teal'c was in love with her. The thought of being with someone who truly loved her almost made her weep. She felt his erection through his trousers and pressed herself against it. He grunted and nipped at her breast. His hand moved to the small of her back and pulled her closer to him. She whimpered and pushed his head back, slipped out of his grip and scooted backwards off his lap.

He gazed at her, the questioning look in his eyes visible even through the sheen of lust. She knelt in front of him and spread his knees apart. She unzipped his pants and reached inside. He groaned as Sam pulled his cock free and stroked the length with one hand. She kissed the tip, ran her tongue around the head and then closed her mouth around him.

Sam eased her mouth lower and cupped his balls. She had to take her time, had to ease him in due to his girth. She'd never had a lover as big as him, so she knew there'd be lubrication issues in their future. She groaned at the thought and she felt him tense as the vibrations traveled through her tongue, across his cock and down to the base of his spine.

She worked her fingers and tongue in concert, using the tip of her tongue to sweep across the vein on the underside of his shaft as she squeezed his balls with a steady rhythm. He shifted on the mattress and nearly choked her. She pulled back and stroked him with her free hand. "Easy on the sudden movements," she said.

"I apologize," he said.

Sam smiled, licked her lips and bent over him again. Before she could take him into her mouth, he stopped her. "Samantha."

She looked up and saw the need written across his face. She backed up and stood to take off her panties. Teal'c gripped his cock and stroked himself as Sam licked her fingers. She spread her legs and touched herself between her legs, stroking her clit and spreading her saliva across her pussy lips. She hated this; a few short years ago, the act of watching Teal'c jerk off would have made her wet enough to take any man in any hole. Now, she needed assistance. Of course, there were better ways to get what she needed...

She stepped forward and whispered, "Lick me. Here." She guided his free hand to her pussy. He leaned in and kissed her stomach. His tongue circled her navel before he leaned down, kissed her pubic hair - once blonde and now a pale gray - and slid his tongue across her clit.

The caress was electric and her entire body shook. Teal'c moved his head to kiss her thigh and his tongue curled around her pussy lips like a searching finger. He pressed the tip of his tongue inside and she tightened her muscles around it. After a few seconds of his attention, she felt soaked. Combined with the pre-come on the tip of his cock, it would have to be enough. She reached down and used her thumb to spread his pre-come around the head and he retreated from between her legs long enough to groan.

She turned her back to him and bent over slightly, lowering herself onto his lap. He gripped her hips and she reached between her legs for his cock. He pulled her to him, and she guided him into her. A bit of pressure and then... Sam cried out and her arm swept out in front of her for something to hang on to. Teal'c let her settle against his lap, let her get acclimated to his size, and began to gently thrust into her. Sam arched her back and lifted her hips, dropped them again, riding Teal'c slowly. She was already feeling out of her body, like she was floating a few inches away and watching. Teal'c put his hand in the middle of her back and swept it down towards her ass.

Sam drew her legs together to increase the pressure around his cock. Teal'c growled and she felt him twitch inside of her. She threw her head back, touched her clit and trembled like an electric shock had gone through her. Teal'c collapsed against the mattress, lifted his hips and came inside of her.

Sam meant to simply say his name, but it came out as sobs. She covered her face and wept into her hands, still sitting on his lap, his cock still hard, filling her completely. When she finally moved, he was still erect, his cock still wet and eager. She lay on top of him and kissed his lips. She put her hand on his erection and stroked him, slowly, methodically, locking eyes with him until he was forced to close them.

He came on her hand, across her fingers and spilling onto his thigh. She licked him clean and saw, to her relief, his erection had started to deflate. She cupped his flaccid penis in her hand and slid up to kiss his lips. "I love you, too," she whispered, only partially surprised to discover she meant it.

With all her heart, she loved him. He had asked nothing of her, had demanded no apologies for what she'd done. It was the first thing she'd done in the past thirty or so years that wasn't tinged with guilt or regret. She kissed him again and felt him hardening against her palm. She smiled and said, "Either I'm going to need a new body, or you're going to have to get used to blow jobs."

"If you insist," Teal'c said with a sly grin.

Sam smiled and licked her lips.

~

"Don't go."

"I must. Otherwise, we will all perish."

Sam held the crystal in her hand, wondering if she could refuse to give it to him. But what good would that do? "Stubborn Jaffa," she said. He smiled and touched her cheek. "If this succeeds, I will have two lifetimes with you, Samantha. Somehow I feel it will not be enough."

Sam closed her eyes and cried. She turned her face to the caress of his rough palm, the hand that had held her as she slept for the past thirty years. The hand that had made her come, the hand that had wiped away every frustrated tear she'd cried. The hand of her husband. She kissed the palm and pressed her body to his in a loose hug. "Tell me," she said. She looked up into his face and said, "Tell me you love me."

"I love you."

"No," she said with a smile. "Not now. Although... thank you. Tell me when you get back. I... would really have liked to know that, Teal'c."

"Very well, Samantha."

She drew his head down and kissed him passionately. He cupped the back of her head and kept their contact a moment longer than necessary before letting her go. She gestured to the door and said, "I should get to the controls."

"Good luck."

"And to you. See you... sixty years ago."

He bowed and watched her leave. The shield rose around him and he closed his eyes. He was in the farthest part of the ship, as far away from the blast as possible. He waited, steadied himself, and then felt a nearly imperceptible shudder as the time dilation field was finally released. The ship rocked with the force of the weapon fire. Teal'c watched the ship explode around him, felt the heat, and then... it reversed. He felt a tug at the back of his skull as the ship swum around him.

Mitchell ran past him several times, going backwards and at a million miles an hour. He saw Sam only once, like an angel flickering against his vision. Daniel and Vala wandered through the room and passed within inches of where he stood. And then, he was back.

He ran as fast as he could, Sam's instructions ringing in his ears. He prayed he wouldn't get some crucial bit of information wrong. He reached the control room and grabbed his wife's wrist as she was about to activate the field. She looked at him and said, "Teal'c, what are you doing?"

"Following your orders, Samantha."

She looked at him quizzically and then looked at the crystal he was holding.

~

When they returned to the SGC, Teal'c and Landry went into a closed-door briefing about what had occurred on the Odyssey. Sam doubted Teal'c was giving the General a blow-by-blow recount of the past fifty or sixty years, but still... what she wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall of that room.

She retreated to her lab rather than pace outside Landry's office. Teal'c's debrief would take ages, no pun intended, and she knew that he wouldn't reveal anything that happened during the ends of their lives.

The thought brought her up cold. The ends of their lives. She had died in another version of reality, grown to old age with the rest of her team and... most likely, had died. She shivered as if someone had walked over her grave. Dr. Lee looked up, having caught the movement out of the corner of his eye. "Colonel?"

"Sorry, Bill. Nothing. Never mind."

"Oh. Okay." He picked up his laptop and carried it from the room, most likely heading to another lab where another part of his experiment was taking up space.

Sam bent back over her calculations and scribbled a little box in the margin. After a few minutes of doodling, she felt someone watching her and lifted her head. "Teal'c." He was standing in the doorway, that mysterious white streak rising from his forehead and sweeping back like a rooster's crown. She smiled and said, "Done with the debrief already?"

"We are taking a breather."

Sam's smile widened. "A breather? I guess you got more comfortable with human expressions during those sixty years, huh?"

He returned the smile. "Indeed. I wished to inquire if you would like to join me for lunch."

"Oh!" she said. She looked down at her pad and winced. "I... actually already ate. And I'd really like to get back to this before I forget what I was thinking about. Sorry. Rain check, though."

He bowed and started to walk away. At the last second, he turned and walked back into the lab. "Samantha." She looked up at the forceful tone of his voice, plus the use of her first name. He'd been doing that a lot lately. "If ever the weight you are forced to carry becomes too much of a burden... I am here for you. You need not bear it all on your own."

Sam blinked at him. "Wow," she said softly. "I... don't think anyone has ever said that to me before. Thank you, Teal'c. That... means a lot to me."

He bowed slightly and left the room. Sam watched him go, turned back to her pad and smiled.

~

The team gathered at the base of the ramp for their next mission. To them, it was another ordinary mission. To Teal'c, it was a return. It was a second chance at life, at living out the rest of his life with Samantha and the team as it was meant to be lived. They exchanged banter, witty sayings, mindless chatter to fill the silence. Teal'c thought back to one night in Sam's bed, when he'd apologized for taking so long to admit his feelings. She had kissed him and said seven simple words, which he repeated out loud.

"Good things come to those who wait."

Sam looked at him with a sudden realization on her face. "You know, as hard as it is for us not knowing, it must be torture for you not to tell us."

Teal'c looked at his wife of thirty years. The woman who had taught him how to play baseball in the cavernous hangar, the woman who had celebrated his one-hundred-and-tenth birthday with him, the woman who had spent almost half her life as his companion. He couldn't shake the feeling that she knew the truth and was just waiting for him to confirm it. Instead of answering the unasked question in her eyes, he said, "Indeed."

"Good luck, SG-1," Landry said.

"Just another everyday mission to save the galaxy, sir," Cameron said.

"Indeed," the rest of the team intoned.

"Godspeed," Landry said.

Teal'c smirked at his teammates and walked up the ramp with them. Just another everyday mission, the first of thousands of future everydays. He would tell Samantha of their life together, of that he was sure. But he needed to find the right time to say the words.

Fortunately, he had all the time in the world.

the end